"Turbo Dog: Not as advertised," Or, "Why I have to fetch my own slippers."
Written: Mar 12 '01 (Updated Mar 12 '01)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: This product is in no way a "Turbo Dog."
Cons: Lousy if you just want someone to lick you.
The Bottom Line: I'm going to use this space to recommend the movie "Snatch." The art direction was spectacular!
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| Hendrx's Full Review: Abita Turbo Dog |
I learned a lot of things from my experience with Abita Turbo Dog:
First of all, never buy a pet over the internet. Because even if you did happen to stumble upon a dog, and not a poorly brewed poison intended for inducing temporary drowsiness, how would they ship it to you?
Second of all, much of the terminology pertaining to dogs apparently corresponds terminology pertaining to beer. "Pack"? "Full-bodied"? "Weight"? "Dark-colored"? I wanted a pack of dogs, I end up with a headache, a sour aftertaste in my mouth, lying in bed with a woman whose name refuses to come to me.
Thirdly, women appreciate it when you call them by their names, not by names you could have sworn were their names. Dammit.
Lastly, the outlets through which today's man can effectively purchase an adrenaline-pumped, energetic canine are not increasing with the expansion of the internet. I thought that sentence was pretty self-explanatory.
So, in conclusion, beer lovers - you have another fine tool to further your dizzy demise, and dog lovers - the search continues.
Recommended:
No
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Epinions.com ID:
Hendrx
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Member: Ben Popik
Location: Annandale-on-Hudson, NY
Reviews written: 16
Trusted by: 2 members
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