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Could you imagine what would happen if the whole world thought the way in which Radiohead’s Thom Yorke does – even us humble Epinions writers? Well, you’d probably end up with something like my first paragraph here, inspired by Like Spinning Plates – one of the more insane tracks from Radiohead’s fifth album Amnesiac – in which Yorke speaks all the lyrics in backwards fashion, apparently. Personally, I can’t make out anything – and wouldn’t be able to distinguish between the backwards method and, say, Swahili. But the point is that Yorke thinks in a way that most humans seem not to – at least on the surface. He tries his best to come up with new and fascinating ways to disorient his listeners. For my money, they sound better and better every time. Nowhere did this become clearer than on Amnesiac.

Let’s face it, Kid A was only the start of Radiohead’s period of musical madness / commercial suicide. I mean, imagine for one second – if you can – that you are in a band. You are in the studio one day, and you all of a sudden discover a wildly ambitious new way to make music. Let’s say you find that hitting the drums with frozen kippers produces a fantastic sound. Or that strumming a guitar with a fork brings out a new, exciting rhythm. Whatever brainwave you have, you would probably be so excited about it that you’d go and record a bunch of tracks using said method – a lot more than you needed. It was the same with Radiohead. They delved into electronica and weird instrumentation and all of a sudden they obviously couldn’t stop writing songs. Thus, they recorded enough material for two albums, and made it apparent when Kid A was released in 2000 that another album from the same sessions would be appearing soon. What they also promised was that the second album would be more guitar-oriented, and also more appealing to a mainstream crowd. Well – there’s a filthy lie if I ever heard one.

Actually, I may have been a bit harsh. They didn’t _completely_ lie. Amnesiac hit the shelves in 2001, less than a year after Kid A. As I say, the band didn’t lie. This album _did_ have more guitars in it. In fact, there are a couple of solely guitar-driven tracks on here. It’s just that, mixed in amongst the more guitar-dominated material, is some of the quirkiest and most insane stuff that the band has ever concocted. The result? A wildly inconsistent and disorienting listen. But it’s funny how these things work out. You see, Kid A was a perfectly worked, precise piece of electronic mastery. Every bleep and thud was timed exactly right, and things ran fairly smoothly the whole way through. It was just extremely cold and harsh, and took a long time to break down. Amnesiac is similar, in that it takes a while to process and enjoy. However – the fact that this one is more eclectic, jumping from one style to another with no clear warning signs, only makes it more inviting in a way. Personally, I found it a lot easier to love Amnesiac’s little eccentricities than Kid A’s. And I have found a lot of people – even on this site – who feel the same way. This may not be true for non-Radiohead fans, but this little circle of plastic is warm and cosy, drawing the listener in until they become emotionally attached. Thus, I’d much rather someone melted down my copy of Kid A than my copy of Amnesiac.

For all the non-Radiohead fans out there – and there are a _lot_ of them, sadly – this one is probably the album that you’ll find to be the most “difficult”. This is where the band lied. As much as Amnesiac will probably be found to be very charming to most established fans, newcomers will find it incredibly difficult to break down. As it never settles into a steady rhythm and / or pattern, it will probably be tossed aside by most who don’t appreciate the band’s music already. My advice would be… _don’t_! That is, _don’t_ toss it aside. Of course, you are an idiot for picking Amnesiac as your first Radiohead album, but there are plenty of things to love and relate to here. You just have to reach inside all of the unease and general mayhem and pull out something tangible. Maybe a little riff that you like, or some odd drum pattern that tickles you in some way. Then work around that, fill in the gaps (i.e. some of the odder tracks) and you’ll get there in the end – trust me. Kid A may be brilliant and eclectic, but Amnesiac is even more accomplished and much weirder. Filled to the brim with uncertainty, quirky little beats, distorted vocals, foreboding atmospheres, and general insanity, this is a tasty little package, and one that should be given time to absorb. Like almost all of Radiohead’s material (except, coincidentally, Kid A), you’re bound to love it eventually.

Track Listing
1.Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box - 2.Pyramid Song - 3.Pulk/Pull Revolving Doors - 4.You And Whose Army? - 5.I Might Be Wrong - 6.Knives Out - 7.Morning Bell/Amnesiac - 8.Dollars And Cents - 9.Hunting Bears - 10.Like Spinning Plates - 11.Life In A Glasshouse

It seems fitting that weirdness should ensue first of all. So, we jump to the most insane track on the album, and indeed Radiohead’s entire back catalogue – Pulk/Pull Revolving Doors. I won’t say that it’s a groundbreaking, excellent piece of music, because it really isn’t. I _will_ say that it’s one of the most tedious, seemingly pointless pieces of music I’ve ever heard. For some reason, I find it mildly entertaining. All it really consists of is a bunch of clicking and pounding noises, working in tandem to create an annoyingly repetitive backing beat, as Yorke’s horribly distorted, warbling vocals ramble over the top. Seriously, he sounds like a robotic chipmunk as he yammers on about doors, spouting some handy Chinese fortune cookie phrases like ”There are trapdoors / That you can’t come back from”. If this is the only Radiohead song you ever hear, I wouldn’t blame you for thinking they are _actually_ robots who try to make music.

However, weird does not necessarily mean bad. This couldn’t be indicated better than by the aforementioned Like Spinning Plates. The song starts off with whirring sounds that can only be described as being reminiscent of “spinning plates”. Looks like Yorke has his head screwed on when he came up with the title for this one. It is indeed a very sparse song, very electronic – but surprisingly friendly and warm. It has all the makings of a “fun” track: buzzing, humming synthesiser tones; those whooshing sounds; melancholy chimes; and the faintest of drum taps. That is, until Yorke’s droning, coma-inducing vocals come in, muttering some sort of gibberish. I know I said he was mouthing lyrics backwards, but hearing it right now I’m not so sure. Whatever the hell he does, I sure have trouble making it out. That is, until he gets to the strangely emotive chorus, and reverts back to normal singing style. Quite, quite entertaining. Just prior to this track came a strange little interlude of sorts, dubbed Hunting Bears for no apparent reason. Basically consisting of a stop-start guitar solo – as haunting as it is – this comes and goes without too much fuss. It’s atmospheric, but that’s about all.

Don’t think you’re getting off lightly with only three weirder tracks, though. There’s certainly more on offer. Opener Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box could almost be described as a “techno” track. Now, I’m no fan of techno music – although a few of my friends seem to be under that illusion – but, to my ears, this is about as good as techno could get. The dense, punchy backing beat is very solid, and gives the song its edge. Making up the foreground are a bunch of metallic, “tinny” noises – appropriate enough to the track title – and some more droning, deep tones. Yorke’s vocals are inhuman enough to suggest that they’ve been processed in some way too, as he moans ”I’m a reasonable man, get off my case” for the duration. Almost as if he wants to start the album by lynching some fans for complaining about Kid A’s eccentricities. Dollars And Cents is the one I found toughest to get into here – I just couldn’t break it down. But now I appreciate it for being incredibly intimidating, almost terrifyingly so. The bass line is rolling and powerful, providing a suitable backing. Yorke uses his trademark “be afraid of me; I can do a falsetto” style, and it works. The eerie, cutting noises that sweep across the track add to the uncertain feel. As do the drums, which never _quite_ manage to get a solid rhythm going. But then again, that’s entirely the point – this track _never_ builds up a rhythm, and is content to noodle away and make you p*ss your pants at the same time.

There is also an alternate version of Kid A’s Morning Bell residing on here, and it doesn’t improve on the original, really. The only thing it adds is a janglier, friendly atmosphere. That, and the addictive drum loop isn’t present – which kinda ruins the whole thing for me. But then again, there’s still that chilling line – “Cut the kids in half". Which on its own is enough to remind me that this track is _not_ jangly and friendly. They almost managed to fool me. You want jazz? The closing track, Life In A Glasshouse takes advantage of a full brass section in order to disorient and confuse the listener. I lied, it isn’t really jazz, but it’s about as close as the band will ever get to it. If you manage to work your way through the spiralling, soloing (in total ignorance of each other) instruments, a tune will definitely creep out. Then you can learn to appreciate this as one of the more chaotic, yet entertaining, Radiohead songs there has ever been. Yorke seems to be fearful of his newfound fame again, and addresses the issue of privacy: ”Well of course I’d like to sit around and chat / Well of course I’d like to stay and chew the fat… But someone’s listening”. Really, this one is tremendous. By anyone’s standards.

Where the real genius of Amnesiac lies, though, is in the “mainstream” tracks. Well, the band would like to have us consider them mainstream. I refuse to see it, personally. But they certainly make up a pretty small proportion of this album. Four tracks, to be precise. But _what_ four tracks! I Might Be Wrong is very groovy indeed, running along a beefy guitar riff and thunderous bass line. The drumbeat may sound a little chopped-up, processed, even “dance-like”, but it’s all good as we hear the guitars and bass churning away together to produce an infectious tune. Yorke’s vocals are lazy, but this track has a “lazy” sort of energy to it, if that kind of thing even exists. ”Let’s go down the waterfall”, Thom utters. Well, I wouldn’t be a gentleman if I didn’t let him go first. But, this is an insanely good song – there’s even a little electronic version of it tacked on at the end incase you didn’t get enough. Continuing the guitar-driven stuff is Knives Out, a track which makes use of a very complex double-guitar attack. It’s so good to hear two guitars churning away and intertwining at the forefront once again, and they create a very creepy atmosphere. Which, coupled with lyrics like ”Catch the mouse / Don’t look down / Shove it in your mouth”, don’t make for a very comfortable listen. But the song is still ingenious, and one of the band’s finest moments.

You And Whose Army? starts subdued, with Yorke sounding somewhat muffled and being accompanied by gentle, caressing guitar strums. But then it all bursts out with jarring piano chords and pounding drums. A tremendous rush, and Yorke rarely sounds better than this. However, the real standout track here – and if it weren’t for Street Spirit from The Bends, my favourite Radiohead song – is Pyramid Song. Seriously folks, listening to this one is like having a baby and a mental orgasm all at once. I’ll admit that I didn’t see its appeal at first, but now I love this little number to pieces. Even before I saw the video, I thought the song had a very “watery” feel to it, and also sounded very otherworldly. It starts off with slow, but uncertain piano chords, and Yorke’s ringing vocals. By the time it has ended, our eardrums are being gently stroked by: a stuttering, unsteady drumbeat that just oozes charisma (???); rising strings that swell and descend gloriously and wash a gentle, comforting haze over everything else; and weird, decidedly eerie tones that sound very Egyptian. Again, _not_ influenced by the damn video… I can’t emphasise this enough. The lyrics are astounding too: “All my lovers were there with me / All my past and future / And we all went to heaven in a little rowboat / There was nothing to fear, nothing to doubt”. If you’ve never heard this song, you’d think I’ve just been prattling away pointlessly here. Well, I had a point – this song is a must-hear. And it is the little shining diamond in this album.

I think I’ve probably said enough already to convince you of Amnesiac’s general weirdness and inconsistency, but I’ll reiterate: Amnesiac is weird and inconsistent. However, like I said earlier, this does not mean that it is not charming, warm, inviting, and really kinda cute in a way. (Did I actually _say_ that last one there?) Unfortunately, most non-fans of the band are likely to shrug this one off straight away – but I am here to prevent that. Non-fans of Radiohead - don’t shrug this one off straight away! Sure, you’re an idiot for choosing it when you’re not familiar with the band in the first place, but bear with it. It may be weird, it may sound unfriendly, harsh and cold just like Kid A on the surface; but it’s really not. I’d go so far as to describe it as Kid A’s slightly deranged, but loving and considerate older brother. Just keep that description in your head, and you’re sure to be fine. As for all of us Radiohead-aholics – we can keep listening to this charming little album, growing more and more in love with it every day.

Excellent: Pyramid Song, You And Whose Army?, I Might Be Wrong, Knives Out, Life In A Glasshouse
Good: Packt Like Sardines In A Crushd Tin Box, Morning Bell/Amnesiac, Dollars And Cents, Like Spinning Plates
Average: Pulk/Pull Revolving Doors, Hunting Bears
Weak: NONE

Final Rating: 17/20


Next up: Hail To The Thief


More on the best band in the world
Pablo Honey
My Iron Lung EP
The Bends
OK Computer
Airbag EP
Kid A
Hail To The Thief
Com Lag

Recommended: Yes