Flat out awful
Written: Jun 01 '08 (Updated Jun 03 '08)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: I'll get back to you on that one
Cons: Everything.
The Bottom Line: A really poor remake of a terrific story. Hardly the equal of the first, and dated, 1971 film
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| edmaidel's Full Review: Andromeda Strain Miniseries |
I vividly remember, back in '71, furiously reading a paperback edition of Michael Crichton's "The Andromeda Strain," and hardly being able to put it down. I also remember seeing the film that same year and finding it a reasonably good facsimile of a genuinely riveting, suspenseful and interesting book.
That, of course was 37 years ago, so when I saw the promos for A&E's up-coming remake, produced no less by such respected folks as Tony and Ridley Scott, I made it a point to put aside whatever else I had planned for the two evenings of the show's four hour running time so I could watch it. So, what did I think? Well, one thing for sure: I certainly could have made far better use of my time.
I don't understand why screenwriters feel the need to "adorn" and alter an already fine story with needless additional characters, sub-plots and current anti- military/establishment feelings and resentments. In the case of The Andromeda Strain,, all these embellishments did was to turn a really terrific story into a really crummy one.
Let's start with the cast. Benjamin Bratt, while certainly decent enough in his years on the TV show "Law and Order," seems to have only one facial expression. That just doesn't work at all when he's supposed to be able to express horror, frustration, amazement and sheer terror. It not only doesn't work for him as a central character, but it doesn't work for the audience either.
Add to his wooden performance all of the following: the needless plot addition of him being estranged from his wife; his romantic involvement with a student in the school where he teaches; and his being very much on the outside looking in insofar as any and all dealings with his distanced teenage son - none of which existed in the original book, or movie.
Instead of taking the chief military officer in charge of a mysterious military operation called "Scoop" and just having him in charge of that operation, let's also make him part of an international conspiracy to probably use the dreaded Andromeda Strain for sadistic military purposes. And let's make him a really horrible person too! Despite Andre Braugher's best efforts in the role, it just doesn't work.
Since the program has to fill a four hour TV time slot (probably less than three hours of actual footage, with the rest of the time taken up by commercial interruptions), let's add a few altogether new, and completely unnecessary characters too. One such character is a drug-addicted reporter (Eric McCormick), who somehow stumbles upon a video of a top-secret military video, and goes about trying to report on it, and continue to investigate the story, running into insurmountable odds.
All these additional appendages do is to completely remove any and all sense of suspense, and completely obliterate any feeling of abject terror as this Andromeda Strain continues to proliferate in its seeming intention of destroying humanity.
For those who never saw the 1971 film, or read the book, here's a very brief outline of the story: a satellite crashes to earth, in a fictitious town called Piedmont, New Mexico. For reasons no one can explain, all of the town's inhabitants are dead, save two: a ceaselessly crying baby, and the town drunk, who just happens also to drink Sterno. Just what a crying baby and a Sterno-drinker have in common, is a question that runs through much of the story.
The Andromeda Strain causes the blood within a human being to instantly turn to a dry powder, killing the person within 10 seconds. Of course, no one seems to be able to stop the spread of the Andromeda Strain, and to find a way to destroy it becomes the core issue of the story.
A sample of the Andromeda Strain is brought into an underground lab in the midst of the New Mexico desert for examination, along with the two survivors, and thus begins the search for a way to end this pestilence and save mankind.
The book and original film (despite being horribly dated by today's standards) moved at a lighting-quick pace. This, new, up-dated version of The Andromeda Strain moves about as fast as a pool of molasses in the midst of the Arctic Ocean. And it's about as scary and exciting as that molasses too. There is just NO suspense whatsoever, and not once does anything even remotely frightening happen throughout the almost interminable length of this dud either.
While the special effects of the '71 film are rather hokey by today's standards, that of this turkey are just plain lousy. As the Strain spreads across the ground, it seems to leave a reddish color on anything it comes in touch with (another addition to the original story). The manner in which this is shown in this new version looks really dumb, as all the effects team did was seemingly spread a rust colored paintbrush across a landscape. This part of the film sets an all new standard for genuinely poor special effects, and given the vast array of CGI available today, that's just inexcusable.
So, if you've never seen The Andromeda Strain, the original 1971 film (directed by Robert Wise) is readily available through netflix, and well worth a rental. It's dated for sure, and some of the then "wowie-zowie" special effects and computer gadgetry today just look silly. Nevertheless, it's a genuinely good story (based on Crichton's first novel) that really intrigues and interests the viewer for its two hour and 11 minute length. At all costs, avoid this A&E remake, unless you're in need of a few hours of sleep.
Recommended:
No
Viewing Format: DVD
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Epinions.com ID:
edmaidel
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Reviews written: 177
Trusted by: 18 members
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