Maybe They Should Call It Bill's Pee-zeria.
Written: Oct 21 '03 (Updated Jun 17 '05)
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Pros: Intriguing decor, good pizza, broad menu.
Cons: NO BATHROOM, surly staff, no table service.
The Bottom Line: Bill's has no bathroom. If you have to go, I recommend going left out the door. Continue down the street and you will see "our" alley on the left.
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| modernmarvel's Full Review: Bill's Pizzeria |
Bill's Pizzeria is a great place, if you don't have to go to the bathroom. The decor is really inventive. The broad menu includes many delicious items in addition to the pizza. The only problem is that Bill's Pizzeria doesn't have a bathroom.
MY STORY
We have eaten at Bill's several times. However, my last visit stands out in my mind the most. I took my two kids to Bill's Pizzeria for dinner. About halfway into dinner, my 4 year old son started wriggling in his seat. I asked him if he had to go to the bathroom. He made a vague gesture and then took the 5th. Distracted by my daughter, I didn't think about it again until my son stood up looking distraught and then started running in place clutching his crotch. Calmly, I asked the counter help where the bathroom was. They told me Bill's didn't have a bathroom. At this point, we were 30 seconds away from a health code violation so I grabbed my son and daughter (since I couldn't leave her alone) and dashed outside. We ran down the street, around the corner and into a dark alley. My son, scared about the dark alley situation but too desperate to protest, whipped down his pants and started peeing. At that very moment, a truck turned down the alley scaring my son. So, of course, he turned toward me and, still peeing, grabbed my leg. Before I could reorient him, he peed all over my pants, his pants and both of my sneakers. We returned to Bill's just long enough to have our food wrapped to take home. My daughter had to carry it since I couldn't wash my hands after the pee incident. If my review of Bill's is biased, you now know why.
DECOR
The first thing that attracted me to Bill's is the decor. Bill's is a hole in the wall kind of place. At most, it might seat 20. Each table is a different height. One table is a door with glass on top. Another is a bar table. All of the chairs are also mismatched. The walls have vintage signs and modern art. Although it sounds strange, Bill's eclectic taste somehow pulls it all together and it is a pleasant place to eat.
SERVICE
Bill's has surly counter service. Once you place your order at the counter and pay, you can have a seat and wait for the counter staff to grunt that your order is ready. The only thing that annoys me is that, in this very small restaurant, they don't bring your food over when it is done. They expect you to get back up and go over to the counter to get it. This isn't too bad if it is one trip. However, they call each dish as it is prepared so you might have to get up several times. You also have to get your own napkins and plasticware.
The other negative is that you have to bus your own table. Of course, some patrons are more diligent with this task than others. If you sit at a table following considerate patrons, you will have a nice experience at Bill's. If not, expect a dirty to disgusting surface to eat from.
MENU
Bill's Pizzeria has a very broad menu. They have pretty good pizza which is regular crust, not too thin or thick. There are tons of wraps, subs, calzones, salads and pasta dinners. The ingredients are usually fresh and the food has been consistently good. Subs are $4-5. Fifteen inch pizzas are $8-9.
THE BATHROOM ISSUE
I am pretty sure that Massachusetts law requires restaurants to provide access to a bathroom. Also, I assume some patrons might want to wash their hands before eating. I can't understand why Bill's wouldn't have a bathroom. Do they have a bathroom for the employees - or does everyone use the alley? If they do have a bathroom for employees, couldn't the counter help give a 4 year old kid a break? Can it be good for business that the patrons are peeing in the alley nearby?
LOCATION
753 Beacon Street
Newton Center, MA
(617) 964-1116
Bill's Pizzeria is located in downtown Newton, MA. There is plenty of meter parking and some free street parking if you are lucky. The T's Green Line (Boston's trolly) stops about a 10 minute walk away. There are lots of shops and restaurants nearby.
OTHER INFORMATION
Vegetarians will have lots of options.
The restaurant is handicapped accessible but some seating is at bar height.
With no bathroom, this restaurant is not kid-friendly, although kids will like the food.
No liquor license.
FINAL RECOMMENDATION
Go to the bathroom and wash your hands before you go. Consider how much liquid your children have consumed in the last three hours before deciding to go to Bill's. If you meet the parameters, you will like Bill's food and decor. Otherwise, eat elsewhere.
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CHAIN RESTAURANTS: Not Your Average Joe’s; Bertucci’s; Legal Sea Foods; Cheesecake Factory; Rainforest Cafe; Fire & Ice; Bugaboo Creek Steakhouse; Friendly’s; Bruegger’s Bagels.
Recommended:
Yes
Kid Friendliness: No
Vegetarian Friendly: Yes
Notes, Tips or Menu Recommendations Pizza, salad roll-ups
Best Suited For: Friends
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modernmarvel
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