Citizen Cake Has A New Home In Hayes Valley
Written: Jul 05 '00
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Top Notch Design From The Architecture, To The Interiors, Down To The Food.
Cons: Not Open Late Enough To Enjoy An After Symphony/Opera/Dinner Treat.
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| ATOM's Full Review: Citizen Cake |
Citizen Cake opened Friday May 12th in it’s new neighborhood, my neighborhood, Hayes Valley. I know this because my friend Angela (“I can’t believe I just called Jeff, Kifwebe”), her friend Karen (“What’s Epinions?”), and I walked passed it the other day in full view of the opening gala. I’m reminded of a garypai review. (Check his restaurant reviews out; he is one of the restaurant reviewers, along with tanster, against whom all of us should judge our own. They are the standard weights and measures of restaurant reviews.) In his review of New York’s Asia de Cuba, garypai talked about being one of the “beautiful people” by simply patronizing this restaurant. Well, those in attendance at the Citizen Cake opening gala were not necessarily beautiful people, but they were “special people.” The place was packed as tightly as one’s pants after eating in a desert café like Citizen Cake with people who had connections and credit card limits that my friends and I did not. All these special people, on display due to the expansive windows of the café, were being waited on by waitresses and waiters with naked torsos, their breasts or electrolisized chests glazened with chocolate. Even though the fact that this is a desert place provides a context for the chocolate-painted bodies, this was definitely another “Only in San Francisco” moment.
Originally in a yet to be gentrified nook of The Mission, the owners of Citizen Cake decided to move to the already gentrified Hayes Valley, on the corner of Grove and Gough (accessible most easily via the 21 bus, but also walkable from the 5, 6, 7, 31, or 71 and any bus that goes down Van Ness (49, 47, or 42). It is perfectly situated between the symphony hall and the opera house, however, Citizen Cake’s hours will not allow for a quick desert after the performance. Presently, it closes at 7pm (7am-7pm M-F; 9am-7pm Sat-Sun).
The design of the café makes me think of Scandinavia. Not that I’ve been there, but the wooden walls, visible crossbeams of the ceiling, and the frosted-squared backs and seats of the chairs reference my Scandinavian paradigms. Above me is a nice sculpture of backboning-frosted wings that is quite beautiful, making me think of a whale’s skeleton.
I ordered the cinnamon roll ($3.00) and coffee ($1.25). The roll is not too bready and has the right amount of cinnamon-icing so that each bite is represented. [Icing, frosted glass chairs, oh, I get it!] This roll is not the overwhelming, you-will-become-diabetic kind you purchase at Cinnabuns. You will not be forced into slumber by the crash from the sugar in the cinnamon roll. You won’t feel like krap after eating it. It’s like baby bear’s porridge, it’s just right.
(Everyone is checking out the frosted chairs, which I’m now noticing have a vertical ribbedness to them. “I have got to sit in one of these chairs!” a man said before he and his partner left. An older boutique-bagged gentleman solidly grabs the back of the chair and sits himself in it just as you would see him do at Ikea.)
The coffee is OK, not dark like Peet’s (the way I like it), not weak like Starbucks (the way I hate it), but it complements the roll well. I get the coffee to go and they only have a small but they do To Go in those nice non-bleached cups that Momi Toby’s uses. Even though I hate the coffee at Momi Toby’s (always weak), I will go just for the cups at times.
Although they serve a lunch menu, Citizen Cake is known for its elaborate deserts. The design doesn’t stop with the chairs and To Go cups. Their Almond Praline Mouse ($4.50) and Rosebud [Get it?] Crème Tart ($4.50)are as beautiful to look at as they are to taste and feel in your mouth. Their After Midnight Chocolate Cake ($21.00 or $33.00), although strangely named for a place that closes at 7pm, is a perfect rectangle with slabs and swatches and slivers of chocolates sprouting atop in a sculpture garden of styles. And the crème de la crème de la crème de la crème . . . ahem . . . one clears ones throat often here, is the Citizen Cake Croquembouche. This is a tower of cream filled pastries that were dipped in hot caramel, all lacquered with sprays and vine-ing of twistable sugar. This comes in only one size, (about the size of a three year old), and costs $185.00. You are paying for the experience with the food, along with the labor and design.
And an experience is what you’ll have here. Whether the Tropical Shag layer cake of tropical passion fruit mouse, vanilla bean buttercream and rum, all carpeted in coconut shaggings ($20.00 or $32.00) or the sweet melting of Vanilla gelato, you will feel special from the pampering provided by the food. The atmosphere and design tricks you into thinking a fjord is just a walk away rather than Highway 101. The place encourages reflection, like a café should, be it the solitary kind in your head alone, or the public kind out loud with your friends.
By the time you read this, word will be out and my friends and I will now have to wait for seating. I just had to come over this first week before this happened. I wanted to feel like I found something special before, like the party we passed window shopping, one had to be a special person to get in again.
I hear the special people next to me, two women, talk of how a woman of their acquaintance is “cosmopolitan but she’s not educated.” Then they go on to condescend how this same woman speaks poor English. Visions of Junior High dance in my head. I don’t know if I want to be a special person anymore.
Recommended:
Yes
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Epinions.com ID: ATOM
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Member: Adam H.
Location: San Francisco, CA
Reviews written: 44
Trusted by: 105 members
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