nycgrl's Full Review: Dave Barry - Dave Barry Turns 50
Hey, You're Not 50, You Hussie!
This is true. But after much raving by a friend on Dave Barry, I casually cruised down the aisle of the library and the first one that caught my attention: that's right, Dave Barry Turns 50 (you're good). And how could I resist the cover of Dave Barry in a wonderfully floral Hawaiian shirt, mid-calf white socks and slip-on loafers? Not to mention the Dave Barry's 10 Signs That You Might be Turning 50, 3 reasons which are "You tend to forget things."
Oh, Davey Dave Barry is a Pulitzer prize-winning columnist and the best-selling author of Dave Barry is from Mars and Venus, Dave Barry in Cyberspace, Dave Barry's Guide to Guys, and other books. He lives in Miami, Florida, of course.
Dave Barry Turns 50 (and he's not even going to MENTION the word prostate)
Chapter 1: Introduction
So you've faced the fact that there's only so many times you can turn 49. You've faced the inevitability of turning 50, and even that it's gonna suck, but WHAM. Out pops Dave to tell you the GOOD things about turning 50. So you can't read a thing. But really, who WANTS to? Plus, you've gotten to the point where it's hopeless to be hip, so now you can dump that and focus on other things in your life, like is that letter an e or an a? And finally, the Boomer's era, those turning 50 'round now, laid the foundation for what our country is about today: "...whiny self-absorption that will probably never be equaled."
Chapter 2: The Early History of the Boomers: Hey, the World Wasn't Exactly Perfect When We Got Here
Dave on the late 40's, when the first Boomers were born: politicians in formal hats, those damn Communists, how 78 r.p.m. records couldn't play a song long enough for a makeout session, the emergence of McDonald's and cowboy TV shows.
Chapter 3: The Fifties Domestic Prosperity. International Tension. Buffalo Bob.
Dave on: Howdy Doody (set in Doodyville, where Buffalo Bob and Clarabell the Clown also reside), how laugh tracks make life easier by telling you what was funny, Dick Nixon, 50s TV, the Space Race with Russia, cars with stylishly enormous tailfins, Elvis, the emergence of Playboy (about time!), Mister Clean and his affair with homemakers and of course, all too many Buffalo Bob jokes.
Chapter 4: The Sixties. Hell Yes, We Inhaled.
Dave on: Kennedy, Dave's first date, the emergence of the Hula Hoop, numerous dances (the Twist, for one), the Cuban Missle Crisis, Martin Luthor King, Jr., the emergence of zip codes, THE BEATLES/GOD, the ridiculousness of the Vietnam War, the goodness that is miniskirts, crazy haircuts, LSD, rock music, Dick Nixon again, private-matters commercial advertising, man on the moon
Chapter 5: The Early Seventies. Maturity Rears Its Ugly Head.
Dave on: antiwar, antiantiwar, drug-related celebrity deaths, Monday Night Football, Dick Nixon's okaying Communism, the emergence of the noseless smiley face :), "I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing" Coke commercials, trying to get the Chinese pandas to mate (only to find they're both males), how rock got "weenie", the end of the Vietnam War (no thanks to Dick Nixon), the Watergate, the streaking fad
Chapter 6: Unite! You Have Nothing to Lose But... But... Shoot I Forgot What You Have to Lose.
Dave on: AARP (Association for Retired Persons) and how it secretly controls the government, and Dave's NEW association, BARF (Boomers Against Reaching Farthood), in which to be a member, Boomers have to deny all that is old, including collecting ceramic cats and wearing knee socks. They may also not have a hat.
Chapter 7: Tips on Looking Young. Fact: Dick Clark Actually Died in 1972.
1) Delay puberty for as long as possible (as Dave did)
2) Get plenty of sleep (because you don't age when you sleep! In fact, says Dave, napping should be encouraged for everyone)
3) Avoid medical care (doctors all secretly tell you there are things wrong with you when there aren't just so they can use their fancy equipment)
4) Learn to manage stress (because according to studies, in Snow White, Grumpy looks older than Happy)
Chapter 8: 25 Things I have Learned in 50 Years
Number 25: Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
Chapter 9: Sending Your Child to College. Remember: You Don't Need Both Your Kidneys
Why is college so expensive? Because, says Dave, "A number of leading colleges and universities have started generating their own electricity using turbines powered by a steam that is heated by setting fire to huge piles of $50 bills." Oh, and Dave recommends that when visiting colleges with your child, be as annoying toward everyone as possible, so that your child won't want to live with you. "In fact many parents, as an extra precaution, enter the Federal Witness Protection Program while their children are away at college."
Chapter 10: Planning For Your Retirement. A Sensible Proposal.
Dave's suggestion: That retired people should go and live with ex-congressmen, who we've generously supported and cared for over the years. They OWE us.
Chapter 11: Ten Signs That You Might be Losing it
7. You sometimes wear a bathrobe to the office.
8. And it isn't your office.
9. And it isn't your bathrobe, either.
Chapter 12: Confronting the Inevitability of Death. You Go Ahead. I'm Gonna Watch The Simpsons.
So you've wasted your life. Tip: STOP THAT.
The End... Oh No, I'm Not Saying It's The End for YOU, I'm Sure You've Got Plenty of Good Years Ahead Of You... I'll Stop Talking Dave Barry Turns 50 is a charming, hilarious book for anyone, 50 or not. The recount of the Boomer years definitely beats my American History textbook. By the end of the book, you'll feel like you've known Dave Barry all your life. The only downside is that this book is completely useless except for a good laugh, and to me, that's worth it. For those who're more into the subtle, ironic humor, Dave Barry really isn't it. This 219 page book sells on Amazon.com for: Hardcover: $15.40, Paperback: $10.36 (used and new) and Audio Cassettes: $24.95. It sells at Barnes and Nobles for: Paperback: $11.65 and Hardcover: $22.00.
Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoy the book as much as I did if you read it!
Epinions.com periodically updates pricing and product information from third-party sources, so some information may be slightly out-of-date. You should confirm all information before relying on it.
- Add to My Yahoo!: 
- Add to Google Homepage: 
© 1999-2009 Shopping.com, Inc.