dimeuhday's Full Review: Melvin Burgess - Doing It
I picked up a book recently at Borders for $8 and change. I don’t know what possessed me. I figured the title was cute the picture was cute, and it would be perhaps a comical read about the birds and the bees and dealing with adolescents.
Perhaps a story about a teen boy and teen girl who just started dating and ‘doing it’ was on the mind of one another, and a comical look at the troubles surrounding ‘it’.
Doing it was a bit hard to understand at first as it was apparent that it was written by someone with a strong European accent. Most of the words and terms in the book were European slang and I had a hard time trying to decide what they meant.
Minge = girls private parts
Shag = well I need not explain that one
Knob = boys private parts
Snogging = making out. I think?
And so on and so on, there were even a few weird words in there that I still have no clue what they mean.
I never thought ‘Doing It’ would be exactly what the title was. I thought things would be a little more discreet. I did not know the author would make 'it' sound so vulgar and disgusting.
Doing It by Mel Burgess follows 3 boys for the most part. Ben, Jon, and Dino. You take a trip back and fourth as each boy explains their situation from their point of view.
Dino is the main pervert. I mean…character in the book for the most part. He’s dating the hottest girl in school, and he um… wants to shag her.
Every time the two are together, (which is often in the book) the whole chapter will be about him banging into her butt with his jeans on, and his knob rising and falling. Knickers coming off, and going on. It’s sick, and I actually grew uncomfortable reading most of the content in this book. Not because I am uncomfortable with the subject of sex, but because of the books general audience targeting teenagers, and I could not shake this feeling that the author was a pervert, and should have been writing for soft core porn magazines, instead of writing for teens in the teen section of book stores.
The Dino and Jackie scenes are always a stretch from teenage love, crossing the line into teenage perversion.
Ben has issues of his own. He’s making it with his hot teacher. However things go extremely wrong when she gets all possessive.
I won’t blow the story for anyone interested in picking this book up, but let me tell you it’s just sick.
The whole Ben story was just another sick twist to this perverted book. An older teacher and a young boy, doing it; something is loose in this authors mind. I went from reading about pervert Dino, to pervert teachers, what the heck is next!?
Jonathan is next. He doesn’t really have any issues, but he’s got a fat girlfriend and everyone makes fun of him for it. Oh but that’s okay, his fat girl lets him do her.
The non-stop cruel way the writer tore apart this obese character was just horrible. The fat jokes were also non-stop, making you wonder if the author has issues with larger woman.
Yeah that’s pretty much the story without giving anything… wait… there was nothing good. I felt like this was the authors perverted little dreams all written down in ink and printed for the masses.
There was no good story line here, the plot was just cut up into different little sex scenes and nothing was really going on but humping, and bumping in each chapter. What the hell!?
All of the characters are nasty, disgusting little vile pigs. I was just waiting for there to be a lesson in all of it, but there was none.
Cheating was acceptable in the book, and everything that happened that should have been unforgivable went forgiven. None of it made sense. The entire book was just a very long porn magazine article written by a dirty mind with perverted fantasies.
I have no idea why Elle magazine would give this garbage 2 thumbs up. I give it one finger. The middle one. ‘Doing It’ is vile, and it’s crude.
I would not of hated it so bad if it weren’t for the way the author portrays woman as stupid mindless sex treats to be taken advantage of and treated poorly. Another middle finger at yah pal.
I hated reading it, but I had to finish it just so I could come on to this site to bash it.
OVERALL:
This type of book is not meant for a teen. I don’t know why some sick pervert would categorize it towards them. Keep you’re kids away from this garbage. I’m glad there was only one copy available, and that no teenager would be subjected to this filth. But then I worry knowing if there is only one copy, some poor kid is probably reading it now, and is shocked.
RECOMMENDATION:
Buy a copy just so you can burn it. This mindless perverted book contains 272 pages of porn for kids.
Trust me it’s the first book I have ever read where I have said... “Let’s have a bonfire” afterwards.
For a better understanding of just what kind of filth I am talking about, take a look at the first few pages from it on this write up:
Now in paperback, award-winning author Melvin Burgess's daringly honest and often hilarious account of contemporary teenage life, and the ups and down...More at HotBookSale
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