Don't Drink the Yellow Water!
Written: Aug 20 '02 (Updated Aug 21 '02)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Low Price; Makes a good tranquilizer
Cons: Watery, thin body; too grainy
The Bottom Line: Miller High Life Light is a watered down mess of a beer that should be avoided unless you really want to get wasted and have almost no cash.
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| Bryan_Carey's Full Review: Miller High Life 2403b |
Hello, fellow Epinionators! This is my first entry in a six- part series, titled “For the Love of Bad Brew”. I have selected six horrible malt beverages for the purpose of this solo write- off, which I will present, one miserable brew at a time, over the next several days. Cheers!
Miller Brewing is one of the world’s largest breweries with a strong presence in the United States and decent amount of sales volume in other countries, too. Most all of us are familiar with the Miller lineup and most beer drinkers have consumed at least a half- dozen or so of this brewery’s products.
Miller brews typical “macro” brew products- beer made in large volume that is generally devoid of much flavor or quality. One of its lamest products is the subject of this review. It’s Miller High Life Light, a weak, watery, boring beer product.
Basic Characteristics of This Beer:
Starting with the pour, you know that this is going to be a lousy brew. The color is light golden, clear, and well- filtered. That’s not necessarily bad, but the foam level is indicative of a poorly- made beer. The fragile head of foam fizzles out completely in less than one minute. There’s still a lively amount of carbonation present, but having no foam on top, coupled with the appearance of urine, makes for an ugly glass of beer.
The aroma of this beer is sweet and grainy, and it pretty much reflects the taste of the product itself. The dominant flavors of this beer are grain, sugar, yeast, and a little bit of alcohol. There is almost no hop taste at all, and practically no bitterness to speak of either. The alcohol level of this product is 4.5 percent by volume, and there are 110 calories in a 12 oz. serving.
I tried to come up with something to compare the taste of this weak beer to, and the thing that comes to mind first is cornbread. I’m not talking about a rich, tasty piece of cornbread covered with melted butter. No, this tastes more like a very bland piece of cornbread that has been dried out, covered with a spoonful of sugar and maybe some other cereal grains, and then dipped in alcohol.
Food Compatibility:
What food would match up with Miller High Life Light? Let’s just say that any type of gourmet food, or even simple meal, deserves better than to be paired with this weak, watery swill. The only food that I would consume with this beer would be cheap snacks like pretzels or corn chips.
Final Thoughts:
Miller High Life Light is a watered- down mess of a product. If you have sampled regular Miller High Life, then you already know how weak and boring a beer can be. Why Miller felt the need to take an already weak product and weaken it even more, I have no idea.
Because this beer is so thin- bodied and watery, it does have one use that helps to make it popular: it’s easy to chug! With the sweetness at this level, and the lack of any real full- bodied taste, this is the type of beer than can be easily consumed in large volume, without ever realizing just how much you have drank.
There’s another reason why this beer does enjoy a small amount of popularity: the low price. This is one of the cheapest macro- brewed beers on the market, selling (in Ohio) for only $5.99 per 12- pack or just $10.99 per case. With such a low price, it’s no wonder that the college- age market and other people on tight budgets reach for this product when they feel the need for a cheap buzz.
Like most cheap beer, Miller High Life Light tastes bad enough when its cold, but it tastes dreadful when allowed to warm. You should try to drink this beer as close to the freezing point as possible, to kill off any remaining hints of flavor.
Cheap beer does have its use, and that consists primarily of getting a good buzz for as little cash as possible. Miller High Life Light does fulfill that need, but it doesn’t satisfy in any other capacity. It’s weak, watery, bland, and boring. Offer me one, and I will respectfully say No Thanks!
Recommended:
No
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