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Re: I'm getting smarter... (Reply to this comment)
by Anaticula
AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGH
Robin Williams is dangerous and he must be stopped. He has about the same effect on me as salt has on slugs. Salt is however, somewhat messier.
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Dec 13 '00
11:18 am PST
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Re: I'm getting smarter... (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Thanks for your nice comments! I do make lots of warning labels, but usually for the benefit of others. For instance, I put labels on all the Robin Williams movies at the local video store that read:
WARNING: CONTAINS ROBIN WILLIAMS
May cause rage or excessive drowsiness. Do not view if you don't want a hack trying to warm your heart against your will!
on the newspaper dispensers for Oregon's finest bird cage liner, "The Oregonian" which you might remember from your Oregon days, the label reads.
CAUTION: CONTAINS NOTHING.
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Oct 24 '00
10:46 am PDT
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Re: I'm getting smarter... (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Thanks for your nice comments! I do make lots of warning labels, but usually for the benefit of others. For instance, I put labels on all the Robin Williams movies at the local video store that read:
WARNING: CONTAINS ROBIN WILLIAMS
May cause rage or excessive drowsiness. Do not view if you don't want a hack trying to warm your heart against your will!
on the newspaper dispensers for Oregon's finest bird cage liner, "The Oregonian" which you might remember from your Oregon days, the label reads.
CAUTION: CONTAINS NOTHING.
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Oct 24 '00
10:46 am PDT
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Re: Outstanding Slug Bait (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Excellent questions, sir. I will do my best to answer them.
1. MHL works on all slugs, but the slugs BEHAVE differently, so you have to account for that. In the west, where we do things like toast pine nuts and put them on pizza, the slug bait must be put next to the curly endive, arugula and rainbow chard. In the east where things are more basic, put it next to the iceburg lettuce.
2. To quote everyone's hero, Nancy Reagan: "Just Say No." Drug resistance education must begin with kittens and puppies. I myself spent many frustrating hours with our cats saying, "Be a good cat, not a bad cat," over and over and over. Sure it was hard, but the rewards have been great. Why just the other day, one of our cats saw me walk into the room and momentarily stopped clawing the couch. We have coached our pets on the evils of drug use and they are very moderate in their use of catnip.
3. We came to the solution to this problem quite by accident. We left the kiddie pool out on the back deck long after the weather turned cold. Now there's about a half a foot of vile skanky algae-ridden water in the bottom. I do believe the local racoons and possums (possa?) have expired from sampling it. I haven't seen them in quite some time.
I hope this helps!
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Oct 23 '00
9:45 am PDT
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I'm getting smarter... (Reply to this comment)
by hadassahchana
...I waited to read this one until the baby woke up. This is howlingly funny! I do happen to agree with your assessment of MHL, but you, sir, could write about boring things, like cars and weed trimmers, with equally impressive results.
However, part way through, I had this really horrible image of your house- and everything in it was covered with homemade warning labels (I'd love to see your fridge, not to mention your change table...)
Cindy, who is going to attempt to get the coffee stains off of Eldest Son's new computer before he returns from synagogue
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Oct 20 '00
5:51 am PDT
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Re: Outstanding Slug Bait (Reply to this comment)
by bested
Great! Three questions:
1) Does it work equally well with Eastern slugs?
2) How do you "pet-proof"? We can't have stoned cats and dogs running around, can we?
3) How does one prevent racoons from slurping it all up before the slugs get to it?
Note: re: question 2) - I guess stoned would be better than their ingesting the various toxic other slug baits.
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Oct 01 '00
1:12 pm PDT
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Re: hilarious (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Wow! Thanks!
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Sep 28 '00
4:33 pm PDT
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hilarious (Reply to this comment)
by eharri3
you got your opinions of the beer across in a uniquely and inventively humorous fashion.
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Sep 28 '00
12:12 pm PDT
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Re: Giggle, giggle, snort, snort, WAAAAHHH! (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Thank you! (And I'm sorry...)
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Sep 27 '00
12:45 pm PDT
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Giggle, giggle, snort, snort, WAAAAHHH! (Reply to this comment)
by akivasmom
You've done it now, Chris! You made me laugh so hard I woke the baby! Thanks, I think...
Wendy
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Sep 21 '00
4:40 pm PDT
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If Miller High Life (Reply to this comment)
by juliette
doesn't bring out the Latin in a person, nothing will! Thanks for an entertaining, informative read.
julie
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Aug 07 '00
11:18 am PDT
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Re: Loved the Epinion (Reply to this comment)
by cking
Thanks for the Good question. I think I have been completely ruined by living in microbrew central, Portland, OR. I have developed an oversensitive pallette, which is really odd since we're talking about beer and not fine wine here. In my college days (about half a million years ago) I drank my share of MHL and its sister brew, MGD, and thought they were just fine. (I must admit, though, the local regional brew, Henry Weinhard, was always preferred.) Fast forward to about a year ago, after years of dark, complex stuff out of the tap at the neighborhood tavern. I was given an MHL at work on a goof-off kind of Friday afternoon. It tasted pale and kinda...well...sharp. It was as though the bubbles were pointy rather than round. I'll probably stick to the frou frou boutique beers I have grown accustomed to. When the paycheck is not stretching sufficiently, I'll grab a sixer of Minotts (mentioned in the review). Not much more expensive than MHL when you catch it on sale, and a much better buy than Widmer and the like.
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Aug 01 '00
12:49 pm PDT
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I can't figure out... (Reply to this comment)
by kyhiera
If this should be in the Home & Garden section... LOL! Thanks for the smile.
kyhiera
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Aug 01 '00
12:31 pm PDT
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Loved the Epinion (Reply to this comment)
by Saxguy
but what do you think of Miller as a beverage for your own consumption?
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Aug 01 '00
12:20 pm PDT
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