I think it's missing the bag of chips...
Written: Mar 16 '01
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Pros: Simple, straightforward approach to a great dining experience.
Cons: Could have purchased and cooked a better cut of meat myself.
The Bottom Line: I won't be recommending this establishment. Maybe it's because I have a preference for Rib-Eye and mine wasn't prepared to meet my expectations; considering what I paid for it.
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| myoptical's Full Review: Smith & Wollensky |
You may have heard of the phrase "All that and a bag o' chips!" While Smith & Wollensky's may be all that it is definitely missing the "bag o' chips." Now, this is not a shoddy establishment by any stretch of the imagination.
It was a cold and windy night in Chicago [I've always wanted to write something like that ::grin::]. I was in town for my quarterly on-site visit for my clients; lucky for me they are all in Chicago. Ending my workday around 10:30 at night wasn't planned, but it proved useful nonetheless. Staying at the Clarion off East Wacker made my walk a tolerable 4-block trek in the crisp and forceful breeze whipping around the buildings downtown. Nick and Tony's was closing down so the concierge at the hotel suggested Smith & Wollensky, as they stayed open until 1am. Being right across the river/street made it even a more feasible location to quiet the discordant chorus emanating from my ravenous stomach and intestines. To gain a humorous understanding of my "hollow leg," I suggest you read my review on Whataburger [a story about my traitorous brother and a brave burger salesperson].
My feet carried me across the river (the roundabout way due to the construction on Wacker Drive). A cordial greeting welcomed me after I avoided stumbling out of the revolving door. It'd been almost 9 years since I've had to deal with them on daily basis 'cause they just aren't common in Texas. I opted to not go to the lower level which was more populated and a bit noisy. Led to a table-for-two, I gratefully took my seat.
My waiter Manfred, who happened to have a Russian accent, introduced himself and we began our normal discourse. I made it a point to mention I'd heard wonderful things about their establishment and they seemed to have a difficult reputation to live up to. He grinned graciously and we continued...
The menu was comprehensive and my brain wasn't willing to engage in Operations Support just yet. So, I ordered a Chardonnay. Not being a wine connoisseur, the house wine did me just fine. Even though I'm quite aware that red wine is supposed to go with steak, I went ahead and ordered the Rib Eye Steak cooked Medium-Well with Broccoli. I just have a preference for white wines. Their steaks are marketed as having been aged 21 days with some process that accentuates the flavor and texture of the meat.
Fresh bread was brought to my table along with butter. A Romaine salad with slices of fresh Parmesan cheese was semi-tasty. Letting my mind wander and tend to personal matters was much easier after I was half finished with my wine on an empty stomach.
My cooked flesh arrived hissing and no longer mooing. 3 heads of steamed broccoli were placed beside the steak. The steak was cooked well on one side and medium-well on the other. And you know what, I was much too tired to even care. I just kept on plugging away at this Flintstone-sized slab of previously grazing bovine and matching each bite with the chlorophyll taste of my broccoli.
Half-way through I requested some juice. They didn't have apple or orange so I settled for Pineapple; which is actually better for digestion anyway.
After I had my fill, I was brought an additional menu which was full of desserts, after dinner drinks, pastries, cigars and the usual liquid caffeine choices. A cappuccino was ordered to help me stay awake while I began to "tune in" to some intuitive vibes about my personal life and my career.
I asked Manfred for pen and paper so I could jot down notes on these waking dreams [at least that's what I call them]. I filled up about 7 pages of notes. A full stomach and a fairly happy palate made for a good brainstorming session.
The decor was meticulously clean, replete with real tablecloths which were promptly replaced after patrons left their table. The interior was accented heavily with dark-stained wood and used indirect lighting. The silverware was both clean and without spots. Napkins had the smell of being laundered. The Irish, American and Chicago flags were displayed in all their glory near the revolving door entrance/exit.
Amusingly, I felt at home seated 5 feet away from a cast iron pig (1' tall at the shoulder) sitting on a free standing border in the middle of the dining area. That reminded me of something a Texan would put in their restaurant...it's a meat-thing; I hope you understand. To extrapolate further, there was a stuffed cow directly above the revolving door. The cow must have been part of a witness-protection plan because he was wearing a Pig mask....how odd!
Nevertheless, I won't be going back to this restaurant. Maybe I was too tired. Maybe my steak was really jacked up. I am for certain that I didn't have the desire to complain and wait for another steak to be cooked. I am also certain that I did not want fast food. Paying $80 for this meal which I didn't completely enjoy has left a bad taste in my cheapskate wallet; and yes my wallet does salivate for deposits and weep for withdrawals.
Recommended:
No
Kid Friendliness: No
Vegetarian Friendly: No
Notes, Tips or Menu Recommendations The selection is diverse so there is enough to keep you there [spending judiciously of course] for at least 4 hours.
Best Suited For: Business
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Epinions.com ID:
myoptical
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Member: JOHN B. WADE III, all liberties reserved
Location: near Chicago, Illinois Republic
Reviews written: 59
Trusted by: 64 members
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