Cons: Dark chocolate Snickers are an abomination!
I like chocolate, but I tend to be rather particular about where my chocolate comes from. Rather than pining for expensive, gourmet fare - Ghirardelli, Lundt and other extravagances - I generally crave more pedestrian treats. Hershey almond bars long were my favorites, just recently upstaged by Cadbury fruit and nut bars, but I've always had a special fondness for Snickers bars, that snack that so famously satisfies.
Snickers has boasted some very memorable ads over the years, always with that same message. It's like Garrison Keillor's rhubarb pie; no matter how lousy a day you're having, a Snickers bar is guaranteed to bring a smile. Maybe it's true, maybe not. I can't honestly say a Snickers bar has ever hoisted me up out of the depths of despair, but it certainly hasn't ever tossed me down there.
It's bulkier than the average almond bar, which is fairly flat aside from the tasty almonds semi-concealed in chocolate. Snickers are bulky, bulging with nougat, caramel and peanuts. They are somewhat comparable to Milky Ways and 3 Musketeers, but I've never enjoyed those quite as much. I can't put my finger on just what, but Snickers possesses a certain pizazz they lack.
I don't want anything to do with the dark chocolate version now gracing shelves, but Snickers also has made the attempt to appease almond lovers with a tasty variation. Still, it's hard to beat that classic Snickers bar, which is available in a variety of sizes and shapes.
The regular-sized bar, the one I can usually snag for less than fifty cents on the way through the grocery line, is probably my favorite, but when I'm feeling especially hungry the King Size is great to sink my teeth into. Fun Size Snickers bars were always among my favorite goodies to receive on Halloween, and whenever a special occasion rolls around at my house, it's a pretty good bet there will be Snickers Minis in the snack bowl.
This past Christmas I was intrigued to discover yet another variety: Snickers in the shape of Santas and Nutcrackers, just a bit bigger than Fun Size. Now that I'm done decapitating those scrumptious Christmas figures, this house is sadly lacking in Snickers-style satisfaction. With Valentine's Day around the corner, maybe it's time to scour the stores for Snickers hearts...