SIT DOWN before reading this review... then take a shower!
Written: Oct 16 '06 (Updated Oct 17 '06)
Product Rating:
Pros: very well written, lots of information
Cons: not a lot of new information that other books don't cover.
The Bottom Line: One of the best books on the market for giving great pleasure to the woman on your list. I highly recommend it to all men or women for that matter.
biscuitfarmer's Full Review: Violet Blue - The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus: H...
I'm sure by now, I am referred to in the Epinions community as the over sexed pervert, but I guess it's just because I'm not afraid to admit that I love sex, and I love giving my partner as much pleasure as possible.
Throughout the years, I have read numerous books, been with several women, and have found a great variety of ways to please a woman. However, I find that regardless of how much I think I know, there's always something else that works better, or can enhance the moment that much more, so I keep searching for more sources of knowledge, I listen to my partners, and I strive to become the best lover that they've ever had, over and over again.
Too often, I think that men get so caught up in their own pleasures that they don't stop to think about how amazing sex could be, if they took advantage of every moment, capitalized on each and every fantastic touch, every sensual kiss. A kiss is not just a kiss, a kiss creates desire, enhances a moment, and can send chills down your lovers spine in an instant. It takes time, patience, and practice to truly learn to be a thoughtful lover. but once you achieve that, the women you do have will come back for more.
The Book
The book, The Ultimate guide to DELETED is broken down into twelve manageable chapters. Each of the chapters is easy to read, easy to understand, and flow extremely well, making the reading easy to do, and less boring than a standard book.
Chapter 1 : One Act, Many Pleasures - This is probably the most important chapter of the entire book as it sets the scene for love. Without the setup, there is no passion and sex is just sex. This chapter tells you how to enhance the moment, set the scene, and make every touch an explosion of passion and desire. It talks about how to look at your partner, how to kiss them, and how to get to oral sex, without just jumping from kissing directly down. Shows you how to flow with the moment, and slowly build up the intensity until your partner is exploding in orgasmic joy.
Chapter 2 : How I learned to stop worrying and love getting head - Far too often, I think partners overlook the importance of communication, foreplay, and fantasies. Too often we are worried about what our partner thinks and we keep our most intimate thoughts to ourselves. This section talks about opening up, letting yourself go completely, trusting your partner completely, so that you can have the best sexual, and specifically oral experience possible. Women need a lot more to relax and enjoy the moment than a man typically does. A woman needs to be stimulated and feel completely at ease with the moment to truly enjoy it.
Chapter 3 : Anatomy for pleasure - One of the most important things about giving oral sex is truly understanding a woman's anatomy. If you don't understand the anatomy, it's hard to understand what will work and what will not. Too often I hear stories about friends of mine who are having difficulty with oral sex with their mates and come to find out they are basically simulating standard sex with their tongue, thinking that all it takes is a tongue penetration. Little do they know, there's so much more to it, it's so much simpler than they believe it to be. This section completely covers the complexity of the female erogenous zones, including full descriptions of those areas and their sensitivities.
Chapter 4 : Health considerations - If you are really into getting a little bit freaky, this section talks about the safety involved in oral sex, rim jobs, and a variety of other topics. This wasn't an area of much concern for myself, as I always made sure that my partner's were tested or were people that I had known for at least a short period of time, so that I could get to know their sexual behavior a little bit better. I didn't want to take the risk of receiving something on my face, that shouldn't be there. That would be an extremely embarassing after booty call moment, that I just wouldn't want to deal with at the water cooler the next day.
Chapter 5 : Tastes and textures - This is a hilarious chapter that pretty much had me laughing throughout. I never stopped to think about the different tastes and textures of different women. It talks about the effects of diet on taste, and just how important cleanliness is to the overall smell, taste, and appearance of the vagina. While this seems obvious, I think far too often, we get caught up in the moment, without fully inspecting the area prior to going down. I generally do a sampling of the area, through a two finger approach that allows me to get an idea of what is going on, before I go down. Other topics that are covered are things such as the difference between going down with someone that is completely shaven or someone that is a bit hairy. This can be quite a challenge if you've never gone down on anyone with hair before and can be quite embarassing if you balk once you get down there. You have to realize what you are getting yourself into before getting to that point and give yourself a pre-oral brief so that you are confident in everything that you are doing. If need be, take the time to groom the area, to ensure that you can see where you are, and what you need to be doing. A woman is never going to freak out because you are taking your time and being gentle. Just keep your cool and do what you need to do.
chapter 6 : Cunning Linguistics - This section is all about foreplay. I think foreplay is too often forgotten before sex. We are in a society that teaches us to go go go, but when it comes to sex, we should definitely slow it down and enjoy the moment. Something as simple as aggressively making out with your partner, flipping each other around, a bit of wrestling, slight biting, stopping to look into their eyes momentarily as you brush away their hair... any of those things work just fine as part of foreplay, but they ultimately help to build the moment not only for yourself, but for her as well. This could make the difference between an orgasm or yet another failed opportunity. The more time you take in the pre-game will ultimately determine your success during the game.
Chapter 7 : Oral Seduction - This is one of the most important sections on oral sex, because it's the actual techniques, how to get it started, and things of that nature. This section talks about a lot of key things that can really help to enhance the moment. Personally, I like the suggestion of having your partner help out with oral, having them stimulate themselves while you are going down, you can do it yourself, but by allowing them to do it, you are taking their mind off of everything else and forcing them to be part of the moment. This is going to make the experience much more focused and result in a quicker, more powerful orgasm. Other items of importance include your rhythm, how are you going to move your tongue, what are you going to do with your mouth, and how will you put it all together. It sounds like quite the complex task, but if you take your time and stay confident, you can create some intense orgasms time and time again. The key is to keep it fresh, try to mix up your pattern slightly, but remember, if it works, it works, so base everything off of what you know she likes.
Chapter 8 : As you like it - This is a section all about personal preference. This is for the people that are disabled and need some extra solutions for their issues. This section covers toys and the introduction of them into oral. Personally, I'm a big fan of utilizing toys, because it allows me to stay more focused, rather than trying to stimulate multiple holes myself, maintaining two similar, yet different rhythms. It's just too much to keep track of for a man, so bringing in toys shows that you are willing to experiment a little bit, and that you are comfortable in your own abilities enough to allow a toy to do some of the work. Toys aren't your enemy, they make your job easier, and they help to make a moment explosive.
Chapter 9 : Tricks or Treats : Advanced Techniques - This is where the fun begins. This section talks about rim jobs, including anal penetration into the mix, adding in some pain, throwing in hot and cold, etc. Personally, I have found that there is a lot to this chapter. Most women seem to be much more explosive in their orgasms, when you are able to stimulate all three areas at once (cli--toris, vagina, and anus). If you are capable of doing all three, without your partner freaking out, then you should be able to achieve some very desirable results and I'm sure your partner will be much happier with the outcome. I have found that women that generally don't ejaculate will ejaculate from this much stimulation, so be prepared for it.
Chapter 10 : Independent Study : Erotic Books and Videos - This is basically a who's who of the sexual world. Gives a lot of different books, videos, and aids that you can use in order to further enhance your sexual experience.
Chapter 11 : Sex Resources - This is a good section if you really don't know where to turn for your sexual exploration questions. Has information for workshops, different stores, etc.
Chapter 12 : References - The source of all the information included in this book.
Different features of the book
The book is organized well into easy to understand and navigate chapters and includes pictures to help in direction around the cli--toris and vagina.
About the Author
The book itself doesn't say too much about the author, however, I know form the past that Violet Blue is an excellent sexual writer, with several other books, including one about how to give better oral sex to men. She is well known in this field and does an excellent job of explaining sexual concepts in a manner in which everyone can understand and truly enjoy.
Final thoughts
While a lot of the concepts in this book are covered by a variety of other books, it is extremely complete in it's subject matter. I have found very few other books that fully cover the stimulation of the cli--toris and vaginal region as well as this book and truly believe that it is the best one for anyone looking to pleasure a woman.
I feel that the writing is extremely easy to understand, and is very step by step in it's approach, so you can start from the beginning and become better as you move along. The key is to open your mind and let it all sink in. There are a lot of concepts in the book that might be too much for you to handle, I can't even handle some of them yet, but the idea is to keep an open mind, read through it, and try to use the information to better understand your current partner or future partners.
Many people enjoy giving and receiving cunnilingus, but where do you turn when you want to learn more about oral sex or ways to introduce it into a re...More at HotBookSale
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