This book is a kind of crash course for that fateful nice girl, who lately spends her time awaiting that call from the guy who now hardly does, or the one who finds herself nagging to see her hubby to pull equal weight and not take her for granted. In contrast to such books such as the ad nasuem "He's just not that into you", Sherry Argov explains in a practical and easy to implement way, stategies for women to better get the results they would like from their relationships, become more empowered, and learn a quite a bit about male psychology along the way. I bought this book last year and I must say I have definitely relied on it through some difficult times! Sharon is amusing, insightful, but she is also to the point, and is both a relationship and self-esteem compendium in one, and that is why this book is such a gem.
The book is broken down into a series of chapters featuring "attraction principles", guidelines to understanding men and dating principles in general. Along with these are a series anecdotes of real stories which further illustrate the principles outlined in the book. I have to admit, some of these may be intuitive, and common-sense, but you'd be surprised at how easily some women may overlook them. I'll notate the ones I found most important and elaborate.
Attraction Principle #3
"A woman is perceived as offering a mental challenge to the degree that a man doesn't feel he has a 100% hold on her."
I couldn't agree with this more. When a man has 100% hold over you, don't forget that also includes your emotional response. When a man wins the love of a woman and feels she has become more than less dependent on him he tends to relax his modus operandi of attaining you at the very least, or worse still, he may begin to take you for granted. Aside from what occurs in whatever sort of relationship you are trying to benefit by reading this book, maintaining your own life, interests, and time also ensure he doesn't get the impression you are under his thumb, and he'll cherish that time you spend much more and also respect you for having your own life too, a sphere outside of him.
Attraction Principle #5
"If you start out dependent, it turns him off. But if it is something he can't have, it becomes more of a challenge for him to get it."
This is easy. Men like a challenge especially, but this is also a general principle of psychology. People feel MORE rewarded when they have to work for something (think of your degree for instance.) If someone had just given it to you, that probably wouldn't be as valuable to you in the end, and the same principle is at work in relationships.
Attraction Principal #7
"Act like a prize, and you'll turn him into a believer."
This goes without saying. There is something to be said about a self-fulfilling prophecy in all areas of your life. If you handle yourself with confidence and know your worth, that radiance and self-esteem will reflect itself to what energies you get back from other people too.
Attraction Principal #21
"If a man has to wait before he sleeps with a woman, he'll not only perrceive her as more beautiful, he'll also take time to appreaciate who she is."
In addition to the above nugget of truth, there is scientific merit to back up the fact that long term relationships fare better when sex is saved for the appropriate time. When is the appropriate time? When there is an intimate bond created through getting to know one another and share mutual esteem. The memories you create through getting to know someone before building to the point of physical intimacy are important and shouldn't be taken lightly.
Overall ladies, if you are interested in gaining knowledge about the opposite sex, and giving your self-esteem a good pat on the back this book is definitely for you!
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