Why Men Love B*tches: Ladies, Stop Being A Doormat!!

Mar 3, 2003 (Updated Mar 3, 2003)
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Rated a Very Helpful Review

Pros:Offers great, sensible advice, easy to read


The Bottom Line: This book is for those of us who have been doormats for too long - it will change your life and your relationship.

At the age of 34, I've had my share of relationships, both good and bad. I was raised not to necessarily be a doormat to men, but to let them be mainly in charge. That's how my grandmother was (before my grandfather died), and how my mom was (before my parents divorced). You pretty much do what the man tells you. Yeah....right!

So here I am at 34, and I'm in a good relationship - well, it's good most of the time. But, my boyfriend is 39, commitmentphobic and freaks out when I mention any type of commitment. My relationship has, for a long time now, been in need of me being a b*tch - I found myself, over the course of this two and a half year relationship, taking too much guff from him. What? Again? This boyfriend too? Why doesn't it help when I complain and cry when he tells me that he's going to a basketball game on Valentine's Day? Because I am not a b*tch - I am the nice girl..who never wins!

A friend of mine who has men falling all over her recommended this book to me - I found it the next day and bought it immediately.

About The Author:

This book was written by Sherry Argov, a radio show host on KRLA in California. She has been featured on The View and has been published in Esquire, Complete Woman, and Women's Own. She also writes for two Los Angeles area newspapers.

"Fine Print" About This Book:

The full title of this book is Why Men Love B*tches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl - A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship. This is a self-help book that can be found in the self-help section of your local bookstore. It was published in October, 2002 in softcover by Adams Media Corporation and has 288 pages.

Inside The Book:

Why Men Love B*tches is not the kind of book you think it is. It doesn't tell you to act like a b*tch every day and treat your boyfriend or significant other like dirt. It tells you the things you need to know - the things your boyfriend or significant other isn't going to spell out for you! We are long past the days of most 18 year old young people meeting at a dance, falling in love, getting married and staying married until they die at the age of 85. Relationships are much more complicated now!

The book is divided into ten main chapters, but with 100 main Attraction Principles within those ten chapters. Here are a few examples of these principles:

Attraction Principle #52: When you nag, he tunes you out. But when you speak with your actions, he pays attention. (This is my favorite principle in the book. The idea behind this is that most women are usually calling and chasing the man they are either interested in or dating. If he does something that shows he is taking you for granted and you leave him alone for a few days after he does this, you will show him that you aren't there, calling him and acting like nothing happened, waiting for him to step on you!)

Attraction Principle #66: Talking about feelings to a man will feel like work. When he's with a woman, he wants it to feel like fun. (This is a very good point. Aren't women always talking about the future and what they want from the relationship? The idea here is to give up all that talk and just be fun to be with.)

The book goes into lots of areas, such as why men are so romantic at the beginning of a relationship and then change, why men take nice girls for granted, how men perceive women who talk too much, how to maintain a life that doesn't revolve around him, and how talking about the relationship too much takes away from the mystery of the future. There is a lot covered in this book and I can't list everything!

It's my opinion that nearly every word of this book is good advice - any time that I have ever put any of these principles in place in my own relationship, I got results - and nearly every time, it was immediately. The thing I like about this book is that it teaches you how to let go of the principles you were raised on - do what the man tells you, etc. In this age of cell phones and pagers, I see so many young girls calling their boyfriends constantly - can't we just maintain a little mystery and let THEM call us? What about the girls who are with their boyfriends every day and every night? Don't they want to show him that they have a life of their own, away from the relationship? If you are guilty of any of these things, you need this book!

How Does This Book Compare To Others?

Why Men Love B*tches is a lot like The Rules and The Rules 2, by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider. These two books also elaborate in detail how to maintain the upper hand in a relationship and not lose yourself. However, Why Men Love B*tches is more detailed and is a little spicier, as well as longer.

Who Needs This Book?

I don't think that this book is only for single women. I strongly believe that any woman who has been a doormat or has been taking too much guff from their man can definitely benefit from this book. I wish I had had this book at the beginning of my relationship - I would have set a different tone from the beginning. Single, dating women will appreciate the advice on how set the pace in the beginning of a relationship.

Price and Purchasing Information:

I found my copy of Why Men Love B*tches at my local Borders bookstore for $14.95. It can also be found on Amazon.com for $10.47.

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