I will not go into detail on this beast. I will just hit the low-lights and move on. I do not own a Saturn ION but my girlfriend does. And since I have the misfortune of riding in it frequently I feel like I can comment on it with a clear conscious. Unfortunately she agrees with my assessments and is tolerating it until her four-year sentence is over. She had a Saturn L200 up until that lease expired a month or so ago. That, was a good car and so she/we figured that all Saturn’s are alike in workmanship and ride. Oh No, my friends, that is not the case at all.

From the outside and in the confines of a perfectly lit show room the Saturn ION is a sporty set of wheels. She purchased the level 3 model with the fancier wheels and the electric package. This particular vehicle also has a sunroof, which made it look like something to have. The body panels are mostly made of a plastic material. You can’t tell this unless you rap your knuckles against it’s skin. There isn’t anything wrong with plastic panels on a car. They have been used for many years. The thing about this car is that it’s way too light. You can feel it on the road. No heft, no substance. A stiff fart from a passing semi will send you wandering. The fit and finish is marginal at best. Some body gaps could be measured with a small paperback book. It looks tinny even though there isn’t any tin involved. The one good thing I can say about the plastic panels is that they are resilient. We took a ride to Woodstock, NY and started back after dusk. That is when the deer population decides to frolic. No sooner did we get on the road that we had a face to face meeting with one. This poor animal ran in front of this brand new car, gave us a very uneasy “oh crap!” look and bounced off the right front corner of the car. We got out and checked it out and did not find ANYTHING wrong with the body, the cars or Bambi’s. The next morning we did find minor crinkling of the paint on the bumper but that was it.

The interior is not unlike the exterior. Cheap plastic and chasm like gaps abound. The back seat folds down to carry larger articles, which is nice. The back seat in the upright sitting position is not. It is small and uncomfortable. Luckily I don’t have to ride back there. I sat back there once to try it out and I’m happy to report that I have not returned since. The front seats are uncomfortable also. I could elaborate but why beat a dead horse. I am really not a negative guy, I’m just giving you the blow by blow as I see it…and frankly this car really blows. The doors are thin and the door wells show the big black screw heads that holds the plastic to the metal. I do not feel secure and comfy in this car. I feel like I am in a Cozy Coupe or a Power Wheel, ask a friend with children and they’ll tell you what I’m talking about.

The ride is stiff. That is a simple sentence on a simple fact. You become one with the road because you feel all that the road is. (That sounds like something out of the Matrix huh?) You feel potholes and even minute crack and road expansion joints that rhythmically send your vertebrae into a cha-cha. We have had a noise coming from the driver’s side rear area that has been driving us nuts. It isn’t constant enough to pinpoint. It’s like trying to find a cricket and when you get close it stops rubbing it’s legs together. The other annoying sound it makes is when I swing my legs out as I’m getting out of the car. Granted I weigh 250 pounds and that anything would probably groan in relief as I got off it/them but a car shouldn’t do that. The struts make a metallic scraping sound as I get out. That just ain’t kosher.

I guess this car has okay pickup. I only drove it once and it seemed okay. I’ll refrain from giving my opinion on this aspect; it’s only fair.

So in closing all I’ll say is that we have to take it to the shop and bring the list of problems for them to look at. Thank God that back seat folds down.

UPDATE: Now that I have spent sometime behind the wheel I'll comment on what it feels like to drive this car. For one thing, like I said, I am large and alas the car is small. It's the square peg in the round hole syndrome. Anyway I was able to situate the seat and wheel to a somewhat comfortable compromise. The engine kicked off quietly to the point that I was wondering if it was truly on. A couple of quick flexes of my accelerator foot told be that it was on. The engine at a standstill was smooth.
I slipped the tranny into drive and it seemed like I was waiting for a belt to tighten or something else to kick in because the forward motion was not instantaneous. This was from a standstill mind you and it concerned me. Once the transmission caught up to the engine the car started down the boulevard. The steering felt tight. Maybe due to the tiny steering wheel. The dealer told us that the car was engineered more for a woman. Even though the steering was managable it was noisey. I heard a rubbing sound coming from the other side of the fire wall.
The breaks were healthy. The car is light so I don't imagine that it would take too much metal to stop the thing.
I then took it out on a faster road. Merging with the other idiots was relativly smooth though the engine let me know that it was doing it's job. It was loud enough but not overly obnoxious. It got us out into the flow without any gesturing from the other motorists. Which is a nice touch.
The trip was long enough to fortify my opinion. This is just a car. This is not something that will WOW your friends or make your family members jealous. You will get from point A to point B in some manner of comfort. And unless this particular car is the exception you may regret the day you signed on the dotted line.

Amount Paid (US$): 19,000 or so
Condition: New
Model Year: 2004
Model and Options: Level 3