I have been a fan of these guys ever since I first saw the video for "I'm An Adult Now" back in 1988. I was fortunate enough to work at Sound Warehouse at the time, so got a free copy of the album from my friendly neighborhood label representative. And I was hooked from the first listen.

TPOH combines everything I love about rock and roll. Steady even rhythms, great guitar riffs, the chorus of harmonizing chick backup singers, funny lyrics, and amazing production.

I read this description years ago about what TPOH sounds like, and it has always stuck with me: IF a van carrying ABBA and a van carrying AC-DC crashed into each other, it would be TPOH.

This was their second effort, released in 1989, after the heavy duty success in Canada and moderate success in the USA. This one deisappeared off the radar pretty quickly here, although "Two Girls in One" was a hit in the Great White North. This was the last album with the original lineup. After this album. it became difficult to keep up with who was singing backup, playing drums, or bass.

Lineup: Moe Berg: guitars and vocals, Johnny Sinclair: bass, Kris Abbott: vocals and guitar, Dave Gilbey: drums, Leslie Stanwyck: backup vocals and acoustic guitar. And production once again by Uber God Todd Rundgren.

Sadly, I think this album does not live up to the potential of the first album. Sophomore slump, as they say. But I still really enjoy it, for my own reasons-- great lyrics and the harmonies TPOH is known for.

The album starts out with a silly ditty called "Food," where Berg compares sex to eating. It's funny how obsessed this guy is with sex. He writes about it, but in interesting ways I have not heard treated by other bands. Check out these lyrics:
"For dessert how 'bout a nice piece of your cherry pie...with some whipped cream on it that would taste so unreal
After we're done I see you sucking on a cigarette...You know there's nothing like a smoke after a good hearty meal..."

"Two Girls In One" treats the modern girl dilemma of a woman who wants to aspire to an ideal, but can't help but be herself at the same time. Nice guitar riffs, and Dave Gilbey pounding away like he thinks he's John Bonham.
"Yelling through the bathroom door 'bout how to liberate the masses while she's putting on her lipstick and curling her false eyelashes..." I love that line.

"New Language" addresses a problem with communication between a couple. An old-fashioned boy and a modern girl, as he says. I think this is probably the only mention of the word "innocuously" in rock and roll. Way to go, Mr Vocabulary!

"Something Physical" describes a relationship that maybe more than a few people are familiar with--- hating the person you're with, knowing that they treat you horribly, but the sex feeling so good that you can't make yourself end things. See? More sex. Nice ticking rhythm and lovely backup vocals.

"There's something physical between you that keeps you tied to him
Like chains it'll drag you down..."

"The One Thing" discusses a man's awful obsession with flirting with strange women, even though he really loves his girl. In other words, he's got one thing that only she's getting. Once again, the evil S word. Sort of great Cole Porter like lyrics in this one though:

I know I should just keep my hands to myself, but I CAN'T...I just CAN'T.
My skin gets creepy crawly, and I 'm so alcoholly that I know it's time for me to leave...cause it all means nothing. I belong to you. And that's something you'll just have to believe."

"No Safe Place" is an obsessive look at a deteriorating relationship, from a man who isn't sure if it should end or not.

"When she's coming in the door when she's walking out the door, hard to tell which is worse.
The false feeling of relief when she comes in
Or the empty feeling when she's gone."

"Shave Your Legs" is a strange homage to women's freshly shaved legs. (And he doesn't even know how it feels to jump between freshly laundered sheets with them all lotioned up! Bliss, right ladies?) This one belongs in the wimp rock pantheon.

"If you Neet your legs I'll lie at your feet..I won't come home drunk and fall fast asleep.
I'll ignore the fact that you've broken my spirit. That contempt in your voice I'll pretend I don't hear it..."

"Runs in the Family" is one of my favorites on the album. A nice steady beat, and fun to sing along to. Sort of creepy, really, but interesting nonetheless. This one, Moe has a girlfriend named Paula whom he has made miserable over the course of their relationship. Now, he's checking out her younger sister!

Paula's sister has no lines on her face. Nobody's hurt her yet.
Paula's smile is still devastating, but I see it less and less.
She looks a lot like Paula did when we first met. Before I wore her spirit down, and filled her with regret." Ouch.

"All I Want" is one of the aforementioned cheesy songs, but it sort of grew on my anyway. I'm a romantic at heart. The lyrics are really nice. Sounds like he's really in love with this girl, but is trying not to pressure her.

"The Miracle of when we're together lives inside of me through the times when we are apart.
I don't want you to walk on water, you don't have to prove yourself to me
I don't need you to catch the roof above me-- all I want is your hand tonight."

"Forbidden Fruit" I love. Another of my favorites on the album. Nice lush arrangements and guitars, and Moe analyzing why he wants what he can't have.

"Why do men choose evil, why do men choose pain
Why do I choose to see you again?"

"It makes me feel so guilty I feel so ashamed...maybe I'll go outside and wash you off me in the rain."

"Little Platoons (My Neighbourhood)" Dead giveaway that it's Canadian! Look at that little u just sitting there in the middle of neighborhood! What is it there for? What does it do?

Anyway...Moe lives in a scary neighborhood in this song. Toronto perhaps? Could be. Nice guitars in here.

"Things in my neighbourhood can get a little rough...but that's where my room is- that's where I keep my stuff..."

"Survival" is another small bit of schmaltz to end with. I think "Little Platoons would have been a better choice, but whatever. Beautiful harmonies make up for it. In this one Moe comforts a girl who obviously has some issues. I'm sensing some stalking issues here. Run, Moe! Run!

"When you get scared you come to me pleadingly...I must be here whenever you call.
To betray your faith would be my greatest sin...your love's so big it makes me feel small.."

Did I mention that I also have case of the heavy duty subskinulars for Moe? No? Okay. I saw them in Austin at the Back Room years ago when the first album, Love Junk, came out, and ended up talking backstage later. I got a kiss on the cheek, and I didn't want to wash the cheek for days.
What can I say? I have a thing for nerds.







Recommended: Yes

Great Music to Play While: Getting ready to go out