I'm writing this review in conjunction with my review on the 1979 Eat to the Beat album, as Union City Blue originates from it. It'll be a quick one, as this is, without a doubt, the worst thing Blondie has ever released.

Have you ever heard one of your favorite songs get tortured, abused, misused, slaughtered, raped, beaten, and put on its death bed? Well, I have, and this is my tragic story. The tragic story of Blondie's powerful, amazing, and dramatic Union City Blue, a song that has gotten the blunt end of the ugly remix stick time and time again. I'm amazed that this song was chosen to even be remixed in the first place-- it doesn't really lend itself to DJ treatments, as showcased by this abysmal 1995 updated single. The first time this song was release in 1979, the song only garnered minor success because the band was riding so high and could have farted on a record and still charted with it. That said, it's actually my personal favorite Blondie track, with Debbie's incredible vocals growing from a lethargic drone to a powerful wail nestled between intense guitar and drum work.

This is one of those songs that is perfect in its original form, and it really shouldn't even be tampered with. Covers, remixes, samples, etc. Just no. They never work out, and if you don't believe me, you want to listen to the destruction and chaos on this club single. Diddy, a dance group, decided that taking this song, stripping all the musical merit from it, and then placing a boring, generic house backing would make this song great. Well, no, they ended up ruining it. I know that this was release in the 1990s, but come on. There are way to incorporate the incredible instrumentation into a club setting, and this was not the way to do it. The production on the Power & Passion remix is abysmal and it sounds like Diddy fell asleep while making it. Debbie's powerful vocals are lost behind cheesy sound effects and a beat that goes against the melody. Seems like there's a stigma attached to the name "Diddy"; everything with the label is forever known as crap. Say it with me kids: ccrraaaapp.

The other remixes don't sit well with me either, and it's a little difficult to tell them apart from one another. Burger Queen Peroxide Power Mix is a disgrace with poorly spliced vocals and another lame beat, and the other two versions, OPM Poppy and Vinny Vero's Turquoise don't fare any better. The only reason to ever buy this atrocious CD single is if you collect Blondie paraphernalia, or if you just want to hear the amazing album version. If you're not a fan of the 1990s/2Unlimited/JockJams house sound, though, then you're better off puncturing your ear drums. The live cover of Donna Summer's I Feel Love is head and shoulders above the remixed sludge, but that's not really saying much. It's an enjoyable take on experimental (manual) disco, but I don't have it on repeat too often, even if I like their minimalist version better. It's just as good (and rather similar) to the version Madonna used on her 2006 Confessions Tour.

Everything that makes Blondie cool is erased on this CD, and that's really disturbing. I mean, okay, Blondie can be remixed. Songs like Heart of Glass, Live It Up, or Rapture, but Union City Blue? You're kidding, right?

Blondie fans? Amiright?

TRACKLIST
Diddy's Radio Edit
Original Version
Vinny Vero's Turquoise Mix
Burger Queen Peroxide Power Mix
OPM Poppy Mix
Diddy's Power and Passion Mix
I Feel Love

Recommended: No