The way I am rating this album isn't just by the quality of the music. That wouldn't be any fun because the album isn't meant to be taken seriously. Because this album is supposed to be the rap take on the WWF superstars’ theme entrance music, I am going to rate the songs on how they take the theme to the next level. If it doesn't improve on the already existing track, then why was it done in the first place? These songs should get the juices flowing and pump you up.

THE GOOD
What constitutes good? Well I believe the song should be in character with the wrestler. It should be better than the original theme song it is closely or loosely following. It should be entertaining and also the lyrics should at least have something to do with the wrestler.

The Kings by Run DMC: “The king of rock who? The king of rock what?” More like “Run DMC who? Run DMC what,” considering many WWF fans aren't old enough to have even heard of them. But, nonetheless Run DMC does a pretty good job at putting lyrics to the Degeneration X theme song. Both songs start similarly with the electric guitar intro that has become famous around arenas worldwide. This song actually improves on the music that it is re-creating. It’s a song that really gets the blood flowing and is arguably the best entrance theme song in all of wrestling.

Know Your Role by Method Man: The Meth can definitely smell what the Rock is cookin. His lyrics really represent what the Rock is about. You can tell that Meth actually watches wrestling and keeps up with the current story lines because his lyrics are on point. “Children and their children, they all chant, with the millions upon millions of Rock’s fans.” It doesn't necessarily follow the Rock’s regular entrance theme, but that’s a good thing. The Rock’s regular theme is definitely one that gets the fans pumped, but it doesn't have a hip hop beat so the change is good. Meth did his homework on this one.

Hell Yeah by Snoop Dogg and W.C.: The formerly Snoop Doggy Dogg sings the hook while Dub C rocks the mike. This is more of a rock beat (actually just an electric guitar) but Dub C and Snoop make it work. If you've heard Stone Cold’s regular entrance theme, think the same, with a little more juice and some decent hard lyrics behind it. “Far from a rookie, I spit in your face, look at you, dare you to say something to me.” If that’s not Stone Cold, I don’t know what is.

Big Red Machine by the Eastsidaz: Snoop’s homies do a great job on this track. Kane is a very mysterious, dark individual and they emulate him. Kane’s regular entrance music is very good at identifying him. This song improves on his identity with the lyrics. “I endorse only sports of a dangerous sort. Seven-three, first degree, maniac unseen, and can’t nobody stop the big red machine.” Another winner with this one.

Big by Mack 10, K Mac, and Boo Kapone featuring MC Eiht: That's one long list of credits for a 4 minute song. The Big Show’s original theme song doesn't really identify with this big man. It’s got more of country twang (why didn't they just call him Big Country) and doesn't seem scary enough, yet alone good enough for someone of his stature. This song is more what I think should represent the Show. Mack 10 (who’s engaged to T-Boz of TLC) and crew do a decent job lyric wise, but the production on this song is what makes it good. It’s a slow, methodical beat, but also has a creepy feel to it. I think the WWF thinks the same as I do because this song has actually become his theme song instead of the twangy old theme.

Ministry by Dame Grease Presents Meeno: Meeno gets very Puffy like in the introduction to this song. He starts yelling, “We ain’t never gonna stop.” I was waiting for him to follow up with Bad Boy 2000. But thankfully he didn't. Meeno does a very good job with this song. He gets in character easily and actually improves on the Undertaker’s theme song. This one is ok by me.

THE BAD

The bad songs on this album seem to be rushed. They seem to not really identify with the WWF superstar they are supposed to. While some of the songs do have some semblance of the original theme in them, they don’t really take the song to the next level.

I Won’t Stop by C-Murder featuring Magic: This song was almost good. It almost made the good list. What is stopping it from goodness? C-Murder. He just does not get it. Gangrel’s character is a vampire. So what does C-Murder talk about? His guns. Did C-Murder think this was an album for the NRA or the WWF? Well he really ruined the song. The song’s beat was like a scary movie. It’s very eery and actually represents the character well, but good ol’ C-Murder ruins it. Maybe Master P should have produced it? Nah, vampires and southern bounce don’t mix.

Break Down the Walls by RA the Rugged Man: RA has a lot to live up to. Chris Jericho’s original theme song is one of the best in the wrestling business today. It really is Chris Jericho. His cocky personality, his sassy mouth, everything is rolled up into one with his theme. Does this improve? No it doesn't. RA just uses clichés to get by with this song and it really does not represent Jericho well.

You Ain’t Hard by Bad Azz and Techniec: This is the closest to being good out of the songs that didn't make it into the good category. It takes the New Age Outlaws original theme song adds a beat to it and it really jumps. Bad Azz and Techniec do a good job spittin out the lyrics fast and hard. There’s only one problem. I don’t think they've ever seen the New Age Outlaws wrestle. The song represents a couple of bar bouncing, fight startin dudes and that’s not really the Outlaws. Yes, their name is the Outlaws, but that’s more or so making fun of the word than anything else. This is very close, but I just wish they at least did a little homework before doing the song. On any other level, it’s good. But the fact that it doesn't really have anything to do with wrestling notches it down one.


THE CELMATIC (THE UGLY)
Why did I title it the Celmatic? Well because a certain user who goes by the name of Celmatic loves to have fun with me. We go back and forth all the time, so this is my latest attempt to get some kicks in.
The rest of the songs on this album get the Celmatic award. They are just plain ugly. Their sole reason for being produced? Album filler? Couldn't think of anything better to do? To steal a line from the Rock, “it doesn't matter why these songs were made” because they are really awful.

Wreck by Kool Keith and ODB: This is the worst attempt at a song on this album. It’s also the worst pairing of artists for one song ever. Both artists have no idea what they are saying and don’t make any actual sense. The chorus done by a very squeaky voiced ODB goes like this. “Punch, kick, fight, bite, kick his ass downtown, first round.” What? Give me a break. Both guys need to go back to drawing board. Actually that would do no good because they would probably just use the time to smoke more weed.

No Chance by Redman and Rock of Heltah Skeltah featuring Peanut Butter Wolf: Peanut Butter Wolf has to be the best handle in the rap game, or at least the silliest. I like Redman, but this song is not the type of song that Red should have done. He’s good when being silly and funny. He should have done a duo with Meth on the song for the Rock. Here he does a decent job on the mike, but it’s really for nothing. The original theme song for Vince McMahon and his son Shane is one for villains. It’s a song for the corporate bad guys who screw all of the people under them. It’s a great theme. But this one is just there. It has nothing to do with the original and doesn't utilize Red at all.

Game by Mystikal and Ras Kass: This is a weird pairing of artists yet again. Mystikal with his fast, fire like verses, with the more laid back Ras Kass. And it doesn't work. Triple H who goes by the moniker “The Game” is a snobby, bad a$$. He’s cool, yet collective, and is the best heal (bad guy) going today. His original music is a hard rock song that screams everything that I just said about him. This song screams nothing, if you don’t consider Mystikal’s throaty yells. Just doesn't do HHH justice.

Pimpin’ Ain’t Easy by Ice-T: It’s good to see Ice T still has a career. Actually if you go by this song, he won’t for much longer. Does this guy actually write the words that are coming out of his mouth? He’s the perfect guy to cut a record for the Godfather. But he slips and slips hard on this record. “I rocks in the East and I rolls in the West.” I guess if Ice-T says so. In ten years when he’s looking for a new job, he won’t want to put this one on his resume.

That's a wrap on the WWF Aggression CD. I gave you the good, the bad, and the just plain Celmatic (ugly).







Recommended: Yes