Is it better to cling to naïve, youthful optimism, or to become a hardened cynic who pokes holes in everything? This is a question I've been dealing with a lot lately, with the cynical side threatening to win out over the youthful side at times. It's a painful struggle; one that rapper John Reuben seems to have a pretty thorough understanding of on his latest project, The Boy Vs. the Cynic.

I've been a fan of Reuben since his debut, Are We There Yet?, and while there aren't many rappers that I've followed closely, I'm glad that I've kept tabs on Reuben throughout the years. He showed promise from the start with music that mixed outside genres with rap in interesting ways (a concept that was fairly new to me at the time, but that even a lot of mainstream rap has been adopting these days), and his lyrics were generally very intelligent, in an easy-going way that showed he didn't take himself too seriously. While his second record, Hindsight, stumbled a bit by being a little less diverse and more of a "music about music" type of album (occasionally a fun thing for a rap song to focus on, but in large doses it can be irritating), he came back strong with Professional Rapper, an album that brought Reuben's more intimate an dark tendencies out on some key tracks, moving between those and lighter, party-themed fare without batting an eyelash. That approach appears to be the template for The Boy Vs. the Cynic, a fusion of two separately planned Reuben albums (one more radio-friendly and one more edgy and heavy in its themes) that would honestly give me a bit of whiplash if I weren't expecting the songs to bounce back and forth as they explored both sides of the coin. Reuben may have been playing with this sort of "split personality" theme all along, but this is the album where his personality comes through the strongest, and as such, it might be his strongest (I know, I gave Are We There Yet? 5 stars when I reviewed it, but it hasn't aged as well and I realize now that my rating was more due to novelty than consistency of content).

It's not easy to recognize how good this album is at first, though. Particularly on the happy, boyish songs that seek to offer encouragement and something for the listener to bob his or her head to, there are moments when Reuben's genre-mixing comes across as a little too intentionally cheesy. I'm all for breaking the rules of mainstream hip-hop, so I don't mind in theory that he would try to rap to bouncy pop/rock songs and all that, but there are a few moments on this CD where I just have to do a double take and think, "Dude, you really shouldn't be rapping to that." This isn't a problem on the "cynic" songs, which are generally darker and slightly less varied in their instrumentation - it's these moments where Reuben's talent as a lyricist shines. Taken without the "boy" side, these songs might be too dense and heavy to make sitting through an album's worth an uplifting experience, so I can appreciate the need for the more fun stuff. If I had one complaint, aside from the inherent cheesiness of a few songs, I'd say that it's the way that the two moods don't seem to mesh at all until the final song. That's probably intentional, but it does hurt the flow of the album a tad.

Basically, the past Reuben songs that you've enjoyed will determine how much you get out of this album. Are you into the party songs like "Gather In", "Life Is Short", and "Doin'"? You'll like a lot of the potential singles here, but you may have trouble following Reuben into the more sarcastic corners of his mind, especially since a lot of his criticisms are directed at the Church, the very same people that he wants to encourage in his happy songs. (Personally, I think a well-timed kick in the butt can be plenty encouraging, if it's called for, and it's definitely called for in this case.) Are you more into the heavier material like "X-Ray", "I Pictured It", and "I Haven't Been Myself"? You'll probably get even more enjoyment out of this album than the "happy" folks. But you'll also be challenged, as I have been, by the more easygoing stuff. Reuben knows what it's like to be the type of guy who constantly questions everything, and he knows that he needs the reminder to kick back and enjoy life once in a while - sometimes a spade is just a spade, and a blessing is just a blessing. Christians who can be honest about themselves and realize the value of both personality types will probably fare the best with this disc. That should include me, because Reuben is making an appeal here to the kind of person that I wish I could become once again.

Out of Control
So where do you stand, it's either break or be broken
Forget dry land, I'd rather stand in the ocean
And let the waves of devotion roll over me
Irony, I had to suffocate before I could breathe...
A rather clean guitar riff starts things out on a positive note as John launches into a chunky beat-driven, nu-metal influenced rap/rocker about how "It feels good to be out of control". His delivery sounds a bit forced at first on this one, as if the beat is too rigid for his words to really flow, but if you're into the whole white-boy-raps-with-an-actual-band-behind-him thing (or if you're a Toby Mac fan), you'll probably dig this. It's harmless fun, John gets in some good rhymes as he talks about the choice to let God take us out of our comfort zones, and he even gets to test his singing range a tiny bit (some background vocals help him out during the bridge breakdown). "It's a bit passionate for your radio" is an ironic statement to shout out at the beginning of the chorus... this thing was tailor-made for Christian rock radio, but that ain't a bad thing.

Nuisance
The conversation lingered on and on
And before I knew it, night had turned to dawn
And were we searching for the truth in all of it?
Or are we debating just to win the argument?
Of all things, you have to figure that Reuben really should know better than to try and rap to the beat of a casual pop-punkish type of song. As this one gets going with a guitar riff that shamelessly recalls such sunny fare as Blink 182's "All the Small Things" and Jimmy Eat World's "The Middle", adding in some cheesy programmed handclaps and a melodic chorus vocal from Matt Theissen (lead singer for the premiere Christian pop-punk band, Relient K), it sounds incredibly awkward, but you almost have to laugh at its obnoxious insistence on getting its point across. It's a highly singable earworm that somehow manages to work once you've had two or three chances to digest it, and John's lyrics are spot on, with him asking whether Christians know how to properly challenge each other, whether they really want to see others grow in maturity and allow themselves to be challenged, too, or whether they're just aiming for the satisfaction of being proven right. As Matt sings, "I'm not trying to be a nuisance, I just think we can do better than this. That was simply my two cents, you can take it or leave it." That's Reuben's career in a nutshell, folks.

Chapter 1
And entertainers sing of extremes that don't exist for you or me
When real life is reality TV
No wonder our youth don't believe in anything
It's all a joke, there are no heroes
Just those of us with high hopes...
The first of the "cynic" songs (appropriately introducing itself with John saying "The Boy Vs. the Cynic, Chapter 1, Page 1", should come across as a little more credible to the hip-hop crowd than the poppy experiments that led off the album (really, those two songs should have been split up - they make John's style difficult for newcomers to take seriously). John begins rapping about a feeling of utter hopelessness over little more than a looping, synthesized keyboard riff, which is later joined by a mellow beat and a more prominent melody line, providing the sole hook to a song with no chorus. His words hit pretty hard - you don't want them to be true, but it's easy to admit that most of us who are at least somewhat idealistic have felt this way upon realizing that we don't live in an ideal world. It's frustrating to want to change the world, but have no clue where to begin or whether it would even matter. Taken out of context, one might be very troubled by this sudden pessimistic turn in John's lyrics, which hangs around for the next two tracks. But he's saying some gutsy things that need to be said here. "21st century America likes its witchcraft civilized." Dang straight.

Follow Your Leader
Conservative, uptight, right-wing, Republican
Last time I checked, I was none of them
But that's the brush you like to paint me with, taint me with
Some aim to please, you aim and miss...
One of the album's highlights builds off of a repeating snippet of acoustic guitar picking and a defiant backbeat, over which John gets a little political as he rants about entertainers who get political. You following that? OK, so it sounds a little hypocritical, but bear with him. What he's saying here is that a lot of celebrities use their platforms to brainwash people, often without really becoming informed on the subject, expecting that their notoriety will be enough to amass a group of followers. John points the finger implicitly at a lot of Christian leaders here, who expect him to fall in line with the "religious right" and play follow-the-leader regarding the political views being held by the most loud-mouthed of the bunch. But he also turns and calls out the Hollywood elite who would tell him to disregard Christ just because of what Christians are doing. To both, he harshly but fairly points out, "Just because you can sing and dance doesn't mean you're qualified to give America advice". I love how this song kicks in with its zippy chorus of loud guitars and synthesizers blaring in unison as Reuben gives these so-called leaders a much needed earful. "Know the truth before you try to turn me into a believer". Well said, John.

Sales Pitch
And they're sitting in the basement pondering energy wasted
Trying to figure out how to make it
Take it to the innocent and manipulate it
Job well done, religion, look what you've created...
A little bit of record scratching leads off a rather dark and cluttered track that casts a very cynical eye on the practice of Christian merchandising. It's one of the tracks that shows off John's mic skills the best, as he rattles through a quick and complicated set of rhymes at the end of the second verse, with nearly every line of the song cutting to the chase and calling out the church for turning Jesus into a commodity to be sold. "Try to sell it to God and see if He buys your sales pitch!", he bitterly shouts over a rather dense and confusing chorus - the only real drawback to the song, due to its thickly layered break beats, background vocals, and John's rapping all competing for the attention of your ears at once. I had originally heard a demo version of this song that cut off at the last verse - "Even the sacred's been turned dishonest", which made for an extremely slick segue into the next song, but it appears that the final version has been extended to include one more trip through the chorus and a bit of fun with synthesizers at the end. It kind of drags the song out longer than necessary, in my opinion.

Sunshine
It's one of those moments in life when you feel incapable
I tried to hide, but the feelings inside are sort of inescapable
And everything that I've become suddenly feels replaceable
And now I'm left to my inadequacy, you get the point...
OK, now this is obnoxious. And I don't mean that in a good way - try as it might to be catchy, this song is one of the most annoying earworms I've had to deal with in recent months. The attitude is decidedly pop/rock here, with its jaunty rhythm and sing-songy melody laid over sunny guitars and "doo-doo-doo" background vocals. It's quite possibly the most awkward thing I've heard anyone try to rap to since the early days of dc Talk. That, and the sudden shift to unbridled optimism, with a chorus that repeatedly proclaims, "Give me some sunshine", is just too much too soon. I recognize that aural schizophrenia is part of the point of this album, but there's a difference between optimistic songs and insipid ones. This one stands firmly in the second category, and I'm glad when its acoustic guitars cut out and a playful "Yeah!" leads into the next song.

So Glad
Are you feeling into it? Are you feeling interested?
Of course, well, meet me at the show, seating is unlimited
Never know what's gonna happen, Mr. Zappin's got big ideas
Life goes by in the blink of an eye, we're gonna take it for all it is...
Now here's a good party song. Over a bouncy bassline and a bumping beat, John gives us his version of a funk-inspired banger akin to Toby Mac's "Diverse City" or his own "Up and at 'Em". It's one of John's tried-and-true theme's (and one of hip-hop's in general) - coming out to the party and shedding your cares and just letting loose. He makes it clear that there's no room for boredom and bad attitudes on this dance floor, and with the help of House of Heroes' vocalist Tim Skipper (who inserts some nice falsetto into this little jam), he tells us, "Do you want something more out of life? I'm feelin' you." This one fares a lot better just because the style it's based off of is a better fit with John's style of rapping. It sounds very natural, and not at all forced.

What About Them?
We came, we conquered, never speak of this again
Life must go on, let's not think of them
Things are comfortable now, the pioneers have settled in
A perfect blend of progress and pale skin...
Taking a journey back into Reuben's mental underground, we get this sinister little song with its snaky synths and dark, bubbling rhythm, as he takes on the voice of wealthy American Christians who couldn't care less about those less fortunate - basically, the whole "prosperity Gospel" concept. Listen to these lyrics and tell me if you don't flinch a bit: "Puff the magic Jesus floats around the universe, the United States is His favorite place on the whole entire Earth." His point is basically that Christians are more than happy to expect Jesus to do tricks and give them stuff, and they'll toss up prayers, but don't really want to do anything to help anyone. It's the kind of song that'll bug people, but it'll bug 'em into starting some dialogue, hopefully. When the group whistling starts in with its almost mocking tone, like a deranged group of Christian Mouseketeers or something, it's hard not to pause and think, "Man, is this how ridiculous we sound to the rest of the world sometimes?"

There's Only Forgiveness
And oh no, the cycle continues
It's an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth
Until they're all loose and you're bitter, blind and numb
You bark but can't bite because you're all gums...
This is kind of a weird song, because it starts in as more of a hard-edged rant with its siern-like synths and slamming beats, and later collapses into something slower, quieter and more reflective. It's almost like two songs fused together - prog-rap? Nah. It's just a noticeable shift in mood, with Reuben first doing a lot of yelling about how some Christians think they have the right to ignore the concept of grace and take revenge on people because it's easier than actually trying to approach conflict with humility, and then later calming down a bit and admitting that man, it's hard to let it go when somebody's really wronged you. It's more noticeable for music than lyrics, I think, but it's an interesting and haunting experiment.

All I Have
Until you don't care or you live and die
Occupied with disclaimers and reasons as to why
Life isn't lived in fantasies, no matter how much planning or strategy
Joy comes along with tragedy, I won them all gladly...
Here comes another sunny song out of nowhere - this one's more of your typical radio-ready Reuben song, with bright acoustic guitars that recall "God Is Love", and Reuben actually singing his own hook for a change. (Interesting side note: This is the first album that features no female guest vocals singing any of the hooks, which kind of goes against a hip-hop stereotype.) It's basically a reworking of the "Life Is Short" theme, where Reuben talks about how he wants to find joy even in the midst of tragedy, because this life is all he's got and he doesn't want to waste it being bitter. It might not be the "high life" that some think he should expect God to give him, but as he says "I kinda like doing things this way". Negative points for starting off the chorus with "I'm alright, I'm OK", but aside from that, it's mostly harmless fun.

Cooperate
Is it your cause or your outfit?
I guess it meant nothing at all in a sense
'Cause if it did, then your involvement would mean more
Than middle fingers and the opportunity to instigate arguments...
For me, the big highlight of the album comes near the end - the only cynical song that stands as an island in between two of John's more hopeful numbers. Over another slamming beat (sounding a lot more like live drums instead of programming - I love it when he does that!), John takes a shot at the overdone "starving artist" persona that some people use to insist that the whole world is oppressing them and they should spend the rest of their lives saying "screw the system". This one probably won't win him points with the underground hipster crowd or whatever, but I actually think he's talking to himself more than anything. He refers to this person's angst as a costume, a way to avoid growing up and taking responsibility, something that maybe they should wear on the weekends for fun, but for the most part, he thinks they need to learn how to work in harmony with society instead of acting like they're too cool for it. It's a tough sell, because he's ranting at someone who is very idealistic and probably means well, but they've just become so caught up in the cynicism that their effort to bring change has been reduced to mere complaining and protesting. I can relate to that, and I love this song because it calls me on my crap and reminds me that I can't keep playing the martyr forever.

The Boy vs. the Cynic
Don't mistake innocence for ignorance
Don't mistake purity for inexperience
Don't mistake humility for weakness
I sincerely mean this, you understand more than you know...
Reuben takes a very sparse, mellow approach on this last track, with a deep bass line, slow drum beats, and a quiet, almost innocent guitar line serving as the only anchors. Here, the two sides of his split personality finally meet face to face and have a conversation, as he reminisces about the days of innocence and asks himself why it seems impossible to go back to a more healthy attitude. He knows that in some ways, he's grown up and it's not right to revert to blind optimism (even the Bible says that great wisdom will bring great pain - I think it's in Proverbs, actually), but at the same time, being so negative is really destroying his spirit and making it difficult to have faith in God. Tim Skipper shows up to sing a heartfelt chorus, which once again hits home as one persona wistfully tells the other, "I remember when I used to be you before you became me". While John sounds a bit downtrodden for most of the song, he perks up as the beat goes double-time near the end of the song, offering some keen observations on how the virtues that the world views as weak are often signs of strength in God's eyes, and concluding that he's going to try to find a place "where the boy and the cynic can both play fair". That's not a sentiment that you'll often hear Christian musicians acknowledging - most would rather cling to blind recitation of the things they already know, rather than questioning and pulling things apart to see if they really make sense. Yet God asks us to approach with a childlike faith, so it's a tense balance to maintain, and this song captures that tension perfectly.

Despite a few musical faux pas or moments where the flow is just plain awkward, I really admire John for making such an honest album that has manages to cut to the heart of a struggle that is very personal for me. More than any other album John's made, this one is a testament to his ability to speak truth and admit to not having it all figured out yet, while having a lot of fun with the music as he does it. It's because of that that I'd recommend this disc as a great starting point for those who are new to John's music, or new to Christian rap in general (assuming you like your rap a little more "off-the-beaten-path"... for a more authentic sound, you'll probably have to go underground, but that's never been an issue for me since I enjoy hybrid genres more).

ALBUM WORTH:
Out of Control $1.50
Nuisance $1
Chapter 1 $1.50
Follow Your Leader $2
Sales Pitch $1.50
Sunshine -$.50
So Glad $1
What About Them? $1.50
There's Only Forgiveness $1
All I Have $.50
Cooperate $2
The Boy Vs. the Cynic $1.50
TOTAL: $14.50

Website: http://www.johnreuben.com

Recommended: Yes

Great Music to Play While: Listening