Plot Details: This opinion reveals major details about the movie's plot.










From the demented mind that brought you the “One Person Write-Off” and “The Pauly Shore Tribute Week”, Freak369 proudly presents The 31 Flavors of Horror.

Frankenhooker might not be a movie that you are familiar with – but it is well worth hunting down. Sure it is cheesy and has more bad acting than all of the 80’s low grade, low budget flicks combined but don’t let that fool you – it is an awesome flick.

The story / plot of the film is a little more advanced than most B horror flicks – combining both a love story with that of urban gore – you get a few storylines running side by side which gives the viewer a little more substance. The main character is Jeffrey Franken, a medical school drop out that has a gift for off the wall creations. It’s just such a creation that ends up killing / dismembering his object of affection – Elizabeth. In a freak lawn mower accident [something that can only happen in a B horror flick I suppose] she’s ripped to shreds. In his somewhat shell shocked state he snaps up her head and tucks it away in the freezer while he hatches his plan to rebuild her – sort of like The Six Million Dollar Man but with hooker parts instead of advanced mechanics.

Jeffrey’s plan is to rebuild his dead Elizabeth piece by piece, but to do that he has to find women. Where else do you turn for suitable, voluptuous body parts? The seediest part of town of course – every city has one – and while the names may be different – they can all be called red light districts. This is where another part of his plan comes into play – in order to avoid having to catch, kill, disassemble and reassemble the body parts he makes “super crack” – anyone who smokes it explodes. Imagine the song “It’s Raining Men” only with the words ‘hookers’ replacing ‘men’.

As he starts to compile the body parts he’s also making one pimp – Zorro - extremely pis_sed off – all his hard workers are exploding all over the place. The special effects are more amusing than realistic but that just make’s it all the more hilarious. One fatal flaw [pardon the pun] is that Jeffrey’s newest creation is extremely high maintenance. She heads to the streets [and street corners] to do some killing of her own. While her method of murder is more shocking [pun intended] than Jeffrey’s ‘killer crack’ it does take her a bit longer to off people since she does it one by one.

Zorro is pushed to his limits when his little worker bee’s are dropping like flies so he decided to finally take matters into his own hands and follows Elizabeth [the rebuilt one] back to Jeffrey’s lab / moms house. This is where most of the action / drama takes place – as well as some of the strange little things like Jeffrey drilling holes in his head [you know, it is really the only way to get rid of the voices]. Without a doubt one of my favorite scenes happens near the end of the film – Zorro get pelted with flying body parts in what can only be called a true “Twin Peaks” moment.


My Take

As I said, Frankenhooker is not a film that many people know about – and if they do know the name chances are they have never seen the film but just heard little bits and pieces about it. I mean, face it, the title alone warrants hunting this down and adding it to your collection. For me, I am still searching high and low for the other two versions of the film – the unedited version that isn’t rated and the Director’s Cut that is rumored to be available on laserdisc.

One thing some people might not find amusing are the movies that Frankenhooker spoofs on. The Bride of Frankenstein being one of the more obvious ones. The scene where he “reanimates” his beloved is comical but some people might not appreciate it. Personally, I found it totally amusing and laughed so hard I almost fell off the couch.

Breaking the mold of B grade films, Frankenhooker delivers much more than expected. The storyline is amusing but does flow – there are small little holes in the plot but I won’t go into those – wouldn’t want to ruin it for you. There are some small issues with the film in general – the biggest is the size of the garage – it’s absolutely huge on the inside but appears to be rather small from the exterior. It’s all explained in the film so if you want to full details on that – go rent it :]

The “Stars”

James Lorinz Jeffrey Franken
[Jerky Boys, RoboCop 3

He was never meant to be a doctor but that didn’t stop him from picking up the old knife and scalpel and making a “new and improved” version of his beloved Elizabeth. The character could have been improved if he would have been addicted to some type of synthetic chemical substance or took pride in his used underwear collection.

Patty Mullen Elizabeth Shelley
[Doom Asylum]

The 21-year-old bride to be bites the dust before she can utter the words “I Do”. Personally I like the new and improved version of Elizabeth – even though she’s really really purple – she has a boosted ego, super human strength and really knows how to pick up dates. It’s pretty hard to say if the acting is bad or she is just taking her part too seriously – either way Patty Mullen’s performance is pretty bland. I really expected more from a former Penthouse Pet

Joseph Gonzalez Zorro
[Death With III]

Clad in his best work out clothing, he’s the pimp with the problems. Every one of his employees [street walkers] is exploding … of course this is after they ingest some of Jeffrey’s special crack cocaine. Poor Zorro, if he’s not getting slapped silly with flying arms and legs then he’s finding himself having to dodge the craniums of his employees coming at him at 50 miles per hour. Imagine Joey Buttafucco only as a pimp…. wait… wasn’t he a pimp… oh I forget :]

Hunting It Down

I have an older copy of this, purchased from a small video store that was going out of business. In hindsight I am now kicking myself because there were literally boxes upon boxes of horror flicks that were up for grabs – most for about .50 cents apiece. You figure, if you bought 20 of them and only a few of them were any good – you still made out in the long run. The box was pretty banged up and worn around the edges but the tape was in almost perfect condition.

Most mainstreams places that deal with VSH videos and DVD’s do not have this in stock – either it is sold out, back ordered or they choose to no longer stock the item. I did have some luck at Amazon.com but with the DVD only [this is the R rated version]. They have it listed for sale at $12.99 [a steal!] however it is backordered. You can buy it used for $49.99 but I highly suggest that you shop around or buy it used from someone in your area so that you can inspect it before you buy it. If you are hard up for it you can cruise over to videoflicks.com and pick up the VHS version for $13.99 or the DVD for $19.99 [plus shipping and handling fees of course].

Who Might Like It

It’s pretty obvious that fans of Henenlotter’s other films [Basket Case I, II and III, Brain Damage and Lurid Women] will fall in love with this. It would be a great gift for someone who loves low budget horror films – think Christmas folks! The few people I have lent this to have all said that it was completely not what they expected – most were rather impressed with the storyline [impressed is a little bit of a stretch … but you get the point] and while the acting leaves a lot to be desired – it fits right in with the feel of the flick.

The Stats

Rating: R
[Violence, Nudity, Adult Content, Sexual Content, Drug Use, Language]
Released March 11, 1990
Run Time: 90 Minutes - Theatric Release
Written By: Frank Henenlotter and Robert Martin
Directed By: Frank Henenlotter [Basket Case]
Gore Level: Amazingly high. 7 out of a possible 10. Exploding prostitutes, drugs that kill, body parts everywhere. The effects might not be top of the line but for the budget of the film they are more than acceptable. A nice touch – the blood splattered lawn gnome.
Most memorable Line: “When a man loses his ho's, he loses everything",

As always… thanks for the read!

^V^ Freak ^V^


Mattjoe: 68 pairs of naked breasts can be found in this film, just wanted to save you the trouble of counting. :]

Recommended: Yes

Viewing Format: VHS
Video Occasion: Good Date Movie
Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age