This is, without the slightest doubt, the worst Godzilla movie ever made. Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse than Godzilla vs. Gigan or Godzilla vs. Megalon, Godzilla's Revenge pops out of nowhere and even ends up becoming more mind numbing than Godzilla's turtle double Gamera, and even more childish.
The story begins with a little Japanese boy, whose name I cannot remember, in Japanese sci-fi movie trademark short shorts, who is bullied by some mean kids - the leader of the kids named Gabberah. Anyway, the kid is a lonely little boy who does some bizarre things throughout the movie - for example, in one part of the movie watch for a scene in which he starts humping a car and reads a sign, saying: "This car is for sale...very cheap! Very good!" As bizarre as this sounds folks, I'm not making it up, see the movie yourself. The boy keeps having fantasies about going to Monster Island, where Godzilla and all his pals hang out. He is nearly killed by a giant bug, falls down a hole, and is rescued by the most stupid creature in Godzilla's rich history: Minilla, Godzilla's son. Minilla is like a prototype of Barney - he talks in the same goofy voice, and looks frighteningly similar to him. Minilla is also bullied by a monster named, oh boy, Gabberah also (wow).
The little boy has these fantasies on and off throughout the entire movie. One day he is captured by two crooks that had just robbed a bank (or something like that) and they take him to an abandoned warehouse (or something like that) where they plan to hold him hostage...or kill him...or rape him...or something - their motives are not clear. The boy goes back to having a fantasy on Monster Island, where he and Minilla (with a bit of help from Godzilla) fight the monsters there and learn how to stand up to bullies (*barfs*). With his new strength the little boy fights the two crooks and they eventually get arrested (wait a second, did Home Alone copy this movie?), and then he faces the bullies for one last time that has got to be the greatest showdown since the gun fight at the end of Leone's The Good The Bad and The Ugly (notice the sarcasm).
The movie ends with trying to preach some incredibly stupid message that I will not bore you with in my review. However, many very important questions remain, which will surely stimulate many viewers for generations to come, enlightening and inspiring all who see this film! Will the little boy's new found highly advanced self esteem help him defeat his enemies? Is there a little Godzilla in all of us? Is the power of imagination the greatest thing we possess? Most importantly: how can a movie sink this low!?
Watch for, if you dare to watch it in the first place:
-The car humping/very cheap/very good scene
-Stoned Japanese Grandfather
-Minilla looks like he's on drugs
-Minilla growing to 30 feet tall or the size of the little boy in a cheap attempt to use the same suit for two different perspectives
-Minilla using a log to do something even goofier than Godzilla's infamous kick/fly scene in Godzilla vs. Megalon
-The little boy falling down a 300 feet deep hole without having a scratch on him when he hits the bottom
-Godzilla getting PO'd at his son when he can't produce atomic radiation breath
-Zipper on the Monster Gabberah
-Fat Japanese kid bully making a bizarre face
-The strange opening credits with the worst theme song in history (sounds like a cross between The Bannana Splits and porno)
-The hilariously bad fight between the kid and the crooks that makes The Three Stooges look sophisticated and meticulously calculated
-On second thought, don't watch for any of this stuff, it ain't healthy.
This is an incredibly awful Godzilla movie that pretends to be an allegory about standing up for yourself, but ends up being just incredibly goofy and childish...hell, even as a child, when I first saw it, I still thought it was ridiculous! This movie is incredibly awful and it would be a sin not to warn people on Epinions to avoid it. So please, for God's sake, stay AWAY from this movie, it's not even fun to hate!
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