Plot Details: This opinion reveals major details about the movie's plot.

What up, my brothas! Welcome to my Black Christmas (and I don't mean Q'Uanz'hah, or whatever the hell it is) write off. Come celebrate the best and worst of hard hitting, hard lovin', two fisted, no nonsense blaxploitation flicks ever offered by Hollywood (and of course from outside the studio system, too). The sleazy, the exploitative, the classics, the forgotten and the crap - all examined over the 12 days of Christmas. However, with this comes a disclaimer:

WARNING! Absolutely no one under 18 admitted to this review!

No, seriously. While I do try and keep in mind that epinions is an all-ages site and do try to mind my manners appropriately, there's no point in being polite when discussing movies like these. Salty language may and will creep in from time to time.

And with that, on to BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA! Can you dig it?

Remember The Defiant Ones, with Tony Curtis and Sidney Poitier chained together at the wrist and on the run from the Law as they make their escape from a deep south prison? Well, take that movie, add some hawt lesbian action, some panty sniffing, food fights. Nuns on the run, some nubile young titties, Pam Grier and throw all that into a Blaxploitation blender set to high and you have Black Mama, White Mama.

The action opens somewhere in the nameless south seas (I'm guessing Thailand or Vietnam). Meet Lee Daniels (played by blaxploitation goddess Pam Grier). She's the main squeeze to the island's biggest pimp/drug dealer, and she just ran off with 40 thousand dollars of his money. Also, meet Karen Brent (Margaret Markov, straight out of . . . well, nothing I've ever heard of at least), leading member of the local anarchist group out to overthrow The Man. Lee and Karen are two of the newest inmates at an all-woman's penitentiary, a hell hole ran by sexually ambivalent wardens who prowl the cell-blocks looking to dispense pain and pleasure in equal doses to the inmates. Of course being a Women In Prison flick, we're not 10 minutes into the film before we get at least one good ogle at all the leading ladies naughty bits in a communal shower sequence.

Being the troublemakers that they are, Pam and Karen get thrown into The Oven (topless, of course) to sweat out the day under the blazing sun. It's not too long before the Warden ship the pair off to another facility - where they were stopped in route by a group of Karen's fellow revolutionaries keen to free her. During the big gun battle, things go horribly wrong - the federales get reinforcements, the revolutionaries are driven off and Lee and Karen high tail it out of there - chained together, of course, for maximum inconvenience. So begins their flight across the island, with Karen wanting to get back to overthrowing the government and Lee wants to vamoose the island with her money. After a gratuitous catfight in their bright yellow miniskirts - er, prison uniforms -- the two put aside their differences long enough to save their skins.

Meanwhile, hunting the pair is the incomparable Sid Haig, as a flamboyant displaced cowboy, right down to the western shirts, six shooters, and country music. As is often the case with low grade b-movie fair like this, Sid completely and utterly steals the show.

Good film? No not really - Pam is just awful in this, almost as if this was her first acting gig (which it wasn't). And the plot is pretty much The Defiant Ones with a mix of Cool Hand Luke - but there's a lot of cheesy fun in this film. You have plenty of nudity for the eyes, tons of bad dialogue and secondary character dubbing that's so obvious it's scary. Director Eddie Romero has the sense to keep proceedings short (and relatively sweet) and moving constantly.

Yeah, it's low brow seventies exploitation trash brought to you by American International Pictures - the masters of Drive In Movie schlock - but it's alarmingly entertaining all the same.

RUDY RAY MOORE OR PAM GRIER? Yes
BREASTS ON DISPLAY: 8
A BRUTHA GETS SOME: 0 times
MUSICAL NUMBERS: 0
EXPLOSIONS: 2
ROUNDS FIRED: 273
HANDRAIL DEATHS: 0
CAR CHASES: 0
AFROS: 3
F BOMBS DROPPED: 6
WHITEYS THAT GET IT: 0
BEST LINE: "To get a gun, you need something to trade that's pretty damn valuable. What you got besides your ass?"
SEVENTIES FASHION SENSIBILITIES: 38%
SOUL POWER 13%

THE DVD -
The DVD is an anamorphic print that looks pretty good but shows it's age. There's a couple of cigarette burns at the reel changes, and the occasional bits of print damage here and there, but the colors are good, with strong blacks and fair line detail. There's some grain, but that's more the source print being used. Audio is 2-channel mono with strong dialogue. You hear what you need to, but it's not too impressive.

THE EXTRAS -
Typical of MGM's budget basement discs, the extras include nothing more than the original theatrical trailer (which is pretty cool in it's own right - where the voice over narrator boldly proclaims "WOMEN IN CHAINS!!! WOMEN IN CHAINS!!!" over and over. We also get one of the best taglines ever: "A thousand nights without a man, a thousand reasons to kill." I miss trailers like that - they don’t make 'em like they used to.

THE BOTTOM LINE
Ok, it's not high art, but there's some good entertaining stuff in there.

ON THE TWELVE DAYS OF BLACK CHRISTMAS, MY SOUL BRUTHAS GAVE TO ME. . . .
12) BLACULA
11) JACKIE BROWN
10) THE FINAL COMEDOWN
09) SHAFT IN AFRICA
08) UNDERCOVER BROTHER
07) DOLEMITE
06) BLACK MAMA, WHITE MAMA
05) MEAN JOHHNY BARROWS
04) TROUBLE MAN
03) SUPERFLY
02) THE MACK
And a LADY COCOA in a pear tree. . . .



Recommended: Yes

Viewing Format: DVD
Video Occasion: Fit for Friday Evening
Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age