Plot Details: This opinion reveals minor details about the movie's plot.

It started out OK. Dad invites his son and all the son's friends to his luxury ski resort for a weekend. You see, Dad and Son have been estranged for quite some time, and Dad wants to mend fences. Son's not too interested but his friends would really enjoy a free ski weekend, so off they go.

That's the basic premise of Friends & Lovers. And, it sounded good to me. Boy was I in for a disappointment.

Dad, as it turns out, is David Rasche, playing Richard. Richard appears to genuinely want to repair the damaged relationship with his son. Too bad he doesn't have a clue how to do so. The son is Ian, played by George Newbern. When it comes to his father, Ian is about the most stubborn man around. He seems incapable of giving his father any kind of break.

But the drama between father and son is only a very small part of this movie. Too bad, because that was the part I really liked.

The bulk of the movie is about the group of friends who turn their weekend getaway into a sexual free-for-all. Despite the fact that they're all somewhere around 30 years old, they mostly act like silly, giggling, hormone-raging teenagers.

Stephen Baldwin is probably the worst of them. 33 or so at the time this movie was made, why is he acting like a 15 year old? He's obsessed over Carla (Claudia Schiffer). Well, specifically, he's obsessed about the size of her nipples. Yes, you read that correctly. He desperately wants to prove his theory, that there's a direct relationship between the size of a woman's lips and the size of her nipples.

Speaking of "size", there's also Neill Barry's penis. Neill wrote the screenplay, and stars as Keaton. Apparently, Neill is, um, well-endowed, and wants the whole world to know it. Yup, we get a full-frontal shot that leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. The women who dared him to disrobe, by the way, run away screaming like little kids. Again, these are supposed to be full grown adults!!

What else? There's Robert Downey, Jr. and his very fake German accent. He's the ski instructor, making time with Claudia Schiffer, who is completely taken with this "foreigner".

There's pregnant, unwed Jane (Suzanne Cryer). She has a crying scene (ironic, given her name) that had me absolutely cringing. Squealing at such a high pitch that only dogs could make out what she was saying, it was one of the most annoying scenes I've ever seen in a movie.

Then there's Dave (Danny Nucci). He's a sweet gay man, who's technically still a virgin, because he's just too shy to approach anyone and get his gay life started. One of the rare treats in this movie is the friendship and relationship that finally develops between Dave and Manny.

Basically it's a movie about a group of people, nearly all of whom "hook up" over the course of the weekend. The whole father/son drama, which could have been wonderful, gets completely lost. Most of the humor is sexually-based, although there are some pretty funny scenes revolving around the father's inability to cook. (Unopened metal can in the microwave for 30 minutes, that kind of thing).

Pretty much, no one should see this movie. Unless, of course, you're a huge fan of Neill Barry and want to "size him up". Otherwise, keep away.


Recommended: No

Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age