There are a couple of things you need to know about me. First, I'm a sucker for anti-Christ films. Hey, I spent three years incarcerated in a Southern Baptist School... it was bound to leave scars. Secondly, any film my mother likes is (usually) one that I would feign death to avoid. You see, Mom is 77 and falls asleep during most movies, TV shows or my monologues. She says that she falls asleep because the 'movie was boring'. Hmm, never does mention my monologues. But she chooses films based on how much action, explosions and big guns there are.

I, however, tend to like either comedies or dramas. Movies without car chases, multiple murders and screams. But, Mom is 77 and I would watch almost anything she wanted because she is my mother, she's also old (please don't tell her I said this) and because I do love her very much. So I brace myself for a couple of hours of bad tv watching every so often. I realize that one day I will miss watching Bruce Willis with her and implosions, explosions and big guns will all remind me of her.

So, it was in that mindset that I sat down to watch End of Days. Did I mention she's gotten me hooked on Days of Our Lives also? I think that proves my devotion right there.

The movie begins as the Catholic church awaits the birth of a baby in 1979. According to ancient and secretive prophesy, this girl will become the mother of Satan's spawn--the Anti-Christ. The Church is divided on using their faith to protect her from Satan and killing her outright. Flash to the girl being born, taken from her mother and used in a Satanic ritual in the hospital basement, aligning her to the devil. It's what you get for using an HMO hospital. They have to make money somewhere.

Flash forward 20 years and an evil entity literally bursts out of the New York sewers (and you worried about alligators, silly you) and takes possession of a guy in the men's room. Moral here--your mother was right, don't sit on any strange toilet seats. There's lots of explosions which I took to mean Satan was trying to keep the home fires burning or perhaps he wanted a warm reception, who knows.

By this time, my Mom was asking me where Arnold Schwarzenegger was. Hey, how should I know? But there he was, in half light, holding a gun to his head. This obviously was a man who had lost something so valuable to him, his life ceased in importance. And words I rarely think, much less say, but good acting by Schwarzenegger as the security officer, Jerico Cain.

Okay, round-up so far: Satan's wife-to-be (Christine York played well by Robin Tunney doesn't know that he's after with the same motives as thousands of human men "get some and get her knocked-up." There's a bunch of priests out to kill her (never make fun of bingo). And all that's standing between her Satanic rape or her death is Schwarzenegger.

We all know who's going to win, don't we?

Okay, the movie is predictable, but the acting is probably 4 star. Satan is admirably downplayed by Gabriel Byrne and reminiscent of Al Pacino in The Devil's Advocate except (forgive me, Pacino) Byrne plays heavily on the seductive powers. And does it quite well. Tunney's confused, frightened waif gave me a peek of what would have happened if Winona Ryder got the wife's part in Devil's Advocate instead of Charlize Theron. I always admire an actress who can cry and still look beautiful. I know it's a fake (no one looks good while crying), but I do have admiration for those who can pull it off on film.

A hackneyed plot and uneven writing do more to harm this film than anything. There are some very good scenes, the one where Satan is tempting Cain is very well done. There are some plot loopholes, but I'm a Stephen King fan, so I'm easy on them. But I always wonder why there are such definite time specifications in all the Satan re-born plots? Let's face it, we cannot adequately say a thousand to two thousand years ago was all the correct time-wise. It's only been in the last century that our world has been united on time clocks, so I'm sure our calendars are not that correct. But that's a minor problem.

This is not a great movie. I've seen better "Let's stop the Anti-Christ before it's too late" films (Rosemary's Baby for example. But it is well-acted so I can forgive the plot for being as predictable as Thanksgiving dinner. It kept my mother awake for the whole two hours and I didn't once sneak off for a cigarette.

Of course, we're still arguing about the ending. I feel it was happy, Mom felt it was sad. I don't know, you judge. We both nearly cried over the New York skyline and World Trade Center pictures. Overall, I would consider this a good snow day movie. It won't hurt you and you really didn't want to go outside anyway, did you?

4 stars for the acting; -1 for recycled plot of every Anti-Christ movie ever made; -1 for reminding of other films; +1 for views of New York Skyline before September 11th.

Total 3 Stars and a "thumbs up" from me. I might even watch it again.

When it snows.

Recommended:
Yes

Viewing Format: VHS
Video Occasion: Good for a Rainy Day
Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age