You might think that a film called "Final Destination" would have no sequels. Going on that theory, you'd think it was a bit odd that the video game "Final Fantasy" has so many sequels. Why not just call the game "Fantasy" and this film, "Destination" or "Cheating Death?" Well, in case you live in a city void of movie theaters and movie rental places, there are three of these Final films.

The first one started a new breed of cult thriller. It was about a woman who saw a terrible airplane accident before it happened. Death came for the ones who were slated to die. This is the recurring theme in the trilogy. The second film was centered about another girl who had foreseen a terrible freeway accident. Again, those who cheated death were hunted down by the super natural power - Death.

In this installment, it centers around a young lady who sees a horrific roller coaster accident before it happens. Seven coaster riders are saved, but DEATH comes after them in dastardly and often LAME ways.

The opening credits was very artistic with various shots of the amusement park set to the ominous mechanical tarot card reader. This sequence was top notch. As was the opening roller coaster crash sequence. As in all three films, the main "accident" is VERY well shot and created.


SPOILERS TO FOLLOW

The director really captured the feeling of helplessness with the coaster's automatic bars coming down and locking the riders into place. I felt a sense of being trapped. I actually got a bit tense. Before the ride can take off, our heroine pleads the operation staff to let them go. The staff lets two car loads of people off. This is quite odd. If they agree to let them go based upon a premonition, why did they allow the ride to continue to operate? I mean, wouldn't the staff inspect the ride before any other car was released? That was a bit lame.

So a few of the riders are killed just as she thought - including her boyfriend. I thought the accident happened a bit too quickly after she was taken to a secured area. They might have milked that moment a while longer.

One of the survivors is a guy whose girlfriend perished in the coaster crash. So these two set out to try and stop the killing by saving the others. Luckily, our heroine has been snapping pictures for the year book. And through an epiphany, she realizes that each picture holds a clue as to the demise of each of the (temporary) survivors. I think this was a very smart idea and was the reason I didn't give this film two stars.

The death scenarios range from ultra lame to inventive. These include tanning bed roastings - now, let me pause to dissect this one. Two girls in tanning booths....water drips onto the main circuit feed. Would it not just SHORT OUT? If 220/230 gets hit by water, would the voltage climb? If the two girls tried to open their tanning bed lids at the same time, wouldn't they have opened since the shelf was just barely in the way of the rails? Another death scenario includes motor vs. a human head (apparently, motors become projectiles if your large pickup is struck from behind with enough force. LAME. More scenarios include a weight lifter's head given a whammy dual battering ram, a hardware store nailing (although what pulled the trigger?), a cherry picker guillotine, a simple impaling and the final climax three-way. The final climax was interesting in that she had another premonition before it happened but the film ended with the implication that they all die anyway.

Of all of these slayings, the weightlifter impressed me the most. We are lead to believe that these two swords would chop the man into thirds, but alas, it was a set up, because the cables of the weight machine were severed by the swords, and the man revels in the fact that he just cheated death. As he uses the machine again, and since the cable was cut, the machine actually rams his head from two sides. Remember the "Return of the Jedi"? Remember when the Ewoks had two large timbers smash the 2-legged walker from two sides? Get the picture?

Some of the dialog between our heroine Wendy, played by Mary Elizabeth Winstead (The Ring 2) and Kevin, played by Ryan Merriman (The Ring 2) was really bothersome. These two had lost their lovers, and they proclaimed not to like each other. So, naturally, I expected them to "hook up" romantically at some point. It never happened. I felt cheated. There wasn't even a kiss. But sex connoisseurs shouldn't complain, because 20-somethings (and roasted tanners) Ashley (Chelan Simmons) and Ashlyn (Crystal Lowe) strip down to their thongs before getting into their death shrouds. The both of them hail from Vancouver, British Columbia. Why do I mention that? I've been to B.C. - The women have no shame when it comes to nudity, fellas. I need to mention a great transition. After the girls were fried, the camera angle went to an overhead shot of the tanning units. It dissolved into an image of their matching coffins at the grave sights. Here's another problem: Why would they have been buried side by side? They weren't sisters. Wouldn't they have been buried with their own families? The writer could have fixed this with simple dialog telling us one of the girls was adopted or that she was a cousin or something. That was a big cheat.

PARENTS: Due to the graphic scene of brutal slayings, I would NOT bring children to this film.

All in all, this film is worth the price of a matinee. I found most of it to be predictable, trite and poorly constructed as compared to the two prior films of the trilogy. Director James Wong (along with the writing) shows signs of brilliance one minute and yet other scenes just die a slower death than the actors do. I just feel as if this film tried too hard to be clever and just fell flat. It's a two star film if not for some of the creative effects-rich death scenes.

I need to quote the critic on IMDB who said, "Note to Hollywood: 40 year-old men shouldn't write dialog for teenage characters. Said men also shouldn't cast a group of twenty-somethings to play these teenagers. It's hard to concentrate on their youthful panic with their crow's feet and breast implants." Yes, it's a film death would walk away from.

There were so many 'birds' in this film, it would have made Alfred Hitchcock giddy. I guess "flipping the bird" is coming back into vogue since so many 20-something teens were seen flipping people off. LAME. Even dumber was the guy who gets cut in half by the cherry picker, but has the mind to flip the bird? It was cute once, but I counted more single and double flips than I've seen (so far) in the Winter Olympics.

Speaking of animals, I bet P.E.T.A. had a field day with this film. It includes shooting birds with a nail gun, a rat getting fried by electricity and a moron who sets off a firecracker near a horse. Cruelty to animals is NEVER amusing. Not since Brothers Grimm have I been more put off by animal cruelty.

Will this film be the FINAL installment? Well, if they feel the need to crank out a fourth one, please hire better and more inventive writers!

Oh, and I have a burning question: Don't guys ever get premonitions? All three films centered around women who suffer from premonitions. What's that about? How about twins? Or how about some deaf mute guy? Change it up a little.

Recommended:
No

Suitability For Children: Not suitable for Children of any age