Buy the Affordable Canon i320 Ink Jet Printer: Britney Spears Naked Breasts Will Thank You!
Written: Apr 29 '03 (Updated Apr 09 '04)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Perfect for printing average-quality photos of Britney Spears naked breasts!
Cons: I don’t have any average-quality photos of Britney Spears naked breasts.
The Bottom Line: I cannot lie. I like cheap printers. And Britney Spears naked breasts!
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| Sordid-1's Full Review: Canon i 320 InkJet Printer |
Printers are just getting cheaper and cheaper. I have almost started looking at them as disposable items – sort of like Bic lighters, chewed-up bubble gum, or used Hyundais. They are inexpensive enough that when one of my printers quit working, rather than weeping, gnashing my teeth, and viciously slamming myself in the crotch with a ball-peen hammer (which is really one of my favorite habits as a response to computer-related annoyances), I merely became mildly peeved and head down to my Fry’s Electronics store for a quick replacement (which also gives me the chance to engage in another of my favored computer-related activities – verbally abusing Fry’s Electronics employees prior to viciously slamming them in the crotch with a ball-peen hammer).
My philosophy pertaining to printers is a simple one: Buy the cheapest one that works.
It is not a bad philosophy, as printer technology has advanced rapidly enough that even the worst new printer I can buy is still pretty damned good.
I don’t do anything special with my printers. I mostly just use them to print letters, invoices, the occasional web page, the occasional cover letter, the occasional manuscript to submit to publications in order to eventually garner another generic rejection letter to jam into a filled-to-the-overflowing shoebox, and, of course, the occasional Unabomber-style manifesto. The simple, bottom-of-the-line printers are more than sufficient to handle the duties of the simple, bottom-of-the-line tasks, which I require of them.
My latest “worst printer I could buy” that is still pretty damned good is the Canon i320 ink jet printer.
Following my “cheapest printer available on the market” edict eventually led me to this printer, which I was able to pick up for a mere $39. As earlier mentioned, that’s even cheaper than a used Hyundai!
And it suits me fine.
It prints clean, straight, easily legible text, and actually does so pretty quickly (10 pages per minute for black, and, according to the manufacturer, 7 pages a minute for color prints.) Personally, I’ve found that when I am printing full-page color photographs of Don Knotts, it doesn’t quite live up to it’s 7 ppm claim, but that’s okay. I don’t mind, and I doubt Mr. Knotts would either.
As mentioned, the text-only print looks just peachy. What surprised me, though, is how sharp and vibrant the color prints come out. This is a $39 printer, for crying out loud, one wouldn’t expect it to pump out sharp, halfassed professional looking image prints. But it does, they look suprisingly good. I have actually used it to print pictures of my children, and they appear, well, decent (the pictures, not my children – my children appear more than decent.)
The manufacturer claims that for color images, the Canon i320 prints 2400 x 1200 dots per square inch. That’s not bad.
In order to provide an example of the color picture quality, I have printed an image with the Canon i320, scanned it, and then uploaded it to my server space to demonstrate what one could expect with this printer. (Unfortunately, my scanner sucks all manner of ass, so it degraded the image a bit.)
To see this example of the Canon i320’s color print capability, just surf to:
http://members.cox.net/codhaddocksalmon/i320testprint.jpg
(And don’t fret, this is just an everyday, normal image. Its contents contain neither Don Knotts nor Britney Spears naked breasts.)
This printer’s minimal system requirements are lenient enough that about everyone who has progressed beyond their Commodore 64 phase is going to be able to handle it (Win98+ w/16 megs of ram, Mac 8.6+ w/20 megs of ram).
When playing with your package (the package the printer comes in), you should find the printer itself, a power cord, a pair of ink tanks (one black, one color), a handful of instructions, and an installation cd.
The installation was the proverbial piece of cake! The install cd also contains some other programs (pertaining to photo albums, manipulation, etc.), but I have other software for such tasks so I didn’t bother to install the special features.
I know it is an odd, if not a bit annoying, convention here at this particular review site for the reviewer to cut a big whomping chunk of text from the manufacturer’s website (more popularly known as “plagiarizing”) and paste it in THIS EXACT SPOT! But I’m an unconventional guy (if not a bit strange-looking and funky-smelling), so I believe I will break with that tradition and rather provide you, the information-starved potential printer purchaser, with a link that will provide you with all the technical specs you could ever hope to absorb about this fine (and cheap! Mustn’t forget CHEAP!) printer. Here are the Canon i320’s technical specifications.
A FEW BRIEF NOTES:
1) This printer does NOT come equipped with a cord to connect it to the computer. You will need to purchase this yourself (or steal it from work.) It is intended for use with USB 2.0, but that is back-compatible and USB 1.1 will work just fine ‘n dandy.
2) Do not use this printer near sleeping children or small black dogs. It is a bit noisy.
3) If you are using this for a business or are an individual who does a LOT of printing, this is probably not the printer for you. It is intended for light home use and the print cartridges are quite small (and quite cheap as well). So if you print documents with great frequency, buy a printer with larger print cartridges, unless you find changing out cartridges every alternate day an enjoyable, rewarding activity.
4) I was just joking about slamming Fry’s Electronics employees in the crotch with a ball-peen hammer. This is against the law and you could probably get a ticket or something for doing that. Instead, I would recommend using a rubber mallet.
5) Please keep in mind that any prices mentioned in this review are not static and are certainly subject to change. On the bright side, though, when dealing with older models of computer equipment, such prices traditionally fluctuate in a downward spiral. Next month, you may be able to purchase one of these fine, serviceable printers for $29! The month after, it might be as low as $19! In a year, it is altogether possible that Texaco will give them away free with every fillup of Super Unleaded!
I can hardly wait.
Recommended:
Yes
Amount Paid (US$): 39.00
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Epinions.com ID:
Sordid-1
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Member: Jeffy
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You wouldn't notice a muddy elephant in the snow, would ya?
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