The Christmas Secret (VHS, 2002)

3 ratings (1 Epinions review)
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Best Left a Secret

Dec 1, 2007
Review by  
Rated a Very Helpful Review

Pros:I can't think of a single one, and I'm in a good mood.

Cons:Everything: scenery, graphics, dialogue, actors

The Bottom Line: Don't. Just don't.


Who knew JohnBoy (Richard Thomas) and others could make such a wretched, wretched movie? "The Christmas Secret" has bad computer graphics--if you must watch this, check out the fake plane just before it crashes--really horrible writing a dialogue that frequently makes no sense and characters so badly out of place as to defy logic.

I mean, really. Beau Bridges as Santa Claus? And he's actually one of the few almost-tolerable elements of this movie.

The gist of the story is as follows:

A college professor who experienced the magic of reindeer as a child decides he needs to know if reindeer really can fly. He sets off to seek them out, crashes his small plane and is rescued by--surprise--an unpleasant elf who drags him to the North Pole village of Santa Claus. Santa, his family and his helpers won't let him leave for fear of betraying their whereabouts.

There he is denied access to a certain room that contains information on how the naughty/nice list is compiled, but he is determined to get in. That's also where his camera is, too, which he wants so he can document the village.

But his big, big problem is that he isn't a True Believer. As in, someone who believes in the magic of Santa Claus. The mostly unbelievable villagers cluck their tongues, express their shock at this heretic in their midst as Santa's children run around trying to get into the toy-development business.

Needless to say, he is eventually won over, gets back to his family by falling out of Santa’s sleigh and into a pile of snow in front of his family and other would-be rescuers and lives happily ever after. Or something.

There is, of course, a cute daughter who helps lead him back to true beliefs, a bossy wife who orders the lackadaisical flight rescuers to keep looking, to fly her around and to generally maintain faith in his eventual rescue.

I'm afraid I'm not making clear how awful this movie is. Even for a made-for-TV Christmas movie, it is bad, almost but not quite to "Plan 9 From Outer Space" bad. It’s not just that the story line is trite; it’s the execution of the story that is so horrible.

Watch it for the illogical conversations, bad scenery, dopey characters who shift in style and personality and the just general unpleasantness of many characters who are supposed to be part of a happy movie.


Thomas must have needed the money. He sure didn't do it for artistic principles. Did I mention that the movie makes no sense?


Recommend this product? No

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