Belly Dance like an Egyptian
Written: Mar 28 '00
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Product Rating:
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Pros: Belly Dancers, Great big monuments for dead people, Lots of Gold
Cons: Keeping the Gold is frowned upon, Not for everyone
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| eeks's Full Review: Egypt |
Nope, that is not the latest hit by the glorious Bangles, but my mind is wandering once again. It’s taking me to another sunny place. A place of belly dancers, camels, and sunshine. More importantly it’s a place I cannot physically visit right now. Fortunately, I have an over active imagination which may just lead to a sunburn at the end of this review. So sit back, enjoy your [insert authentic Egyptian equivalent of a Pina Colada here] and enjoy Egypt from the comfort of your big comfy leather computer chair (or in my case old uncomfortable wooden chair).
Yes, I have been to Egypt. No, you may not touch me. I was lucky enough to be jerked out of school for well over a week and thrown on a plane for an eternally long flight for a journey to the place we just happened to be studying in Western Civ at the time. The mention of Belly Dancers in one of the travel brochures certainly did not stifle my excitement either.
Remember: This is through the eyes of a 15 year old who’s hormones are more important than the niceties of life, like oxygen.
The Resort
We stayed in three places on this particular trip, all chosen by the embassy and our real live Egyptian tour guide. For the first few nights, a very large suite/apartment was bestowed on us. I was much relieved having been under the impression we were going to have to stay in the clay houses built on top of a large cemetery in downtown Cairo. For the next few nights we found ourselves in a more moderate sized suite (i.e. less than 3000 square feet) right off the Suez Canal outside of Port Said. For the remainder of our time in Egypt we cruised up the Nile River and played Ping- Pong with a bunch of Indian people. Sadly I spent two days on the ship with my head in the toilet from food poisoning. The three inch malaria pills we had to take did not help that condition one bit.
The Land, The Weather, The Sun
It’s Egypt. It just doesn’t get any more “cultural” than this. The weather was great, before about 1pm and after about 5pm. The heat was incredible in the way that oven heat seems incredible when you’re pulling some hot peach cobbler out for consumption by me. Mmm…. Peach cobbler. Mmm…Coca-cola. Maybe I should move to Georgia?
The People
My stay in Egypt was a huge culture shock. I was not in the least bit prepared for their mannerisms and customs. Without the tour guide I probably would have insulted one of them to the point of me losing an essential organ of some sort. The best way to illustrate Egyptian culture is to explain how they drive. They don’t use their headlights, they use entrance ramps for exit ramps, and medians mean nothing. Life in Egypt is fast paced and energetic. Then we hit the markets. The merchants were nuts, and I was scared. They just did not seem to understand the word “no.” No just means that the initial offer was not good enough and inspires them to make a new one that’s not quite as outrageous as the first. One particular man was trying to sell a “gold” necklace to my dad saying my mother would like it “very a lot.” My dad said no several times and finally turned to walk away, at which point the merchant decided to just shove the necklace in my mom’s back pocket and start screaming that we owed him money for his goods. Fortunately the tourist police (yes, there are actual tourist police) understood how things worked in the market place and subdued the man before he caused himself a heart attack. After the merchant was settled, I saw the other side of the Egyptian people. Our guide struck up a conversation with him and after five minutes they seemed like best friends. They did a nice job of separating business from social, and I learned a bit about when to relax from them.
The Snake
I saw a snake charmer in the market place. It was quite cool.
What to Do
I saw the pyramids, looked at more dead people’s tombs, saw mummies, laughed at how small the Sphinx was, played ping- pong with Indians on a cruise boat, ate squid, and got a massive dose of culture. Fully experiencing Egypt takes a lot longer than most vacations.
The coolest was the pyramids. Those things are absolutely massive, and they put the Mayans to shame. I’m still reeling from the thought of having to move those great big blocks around and create a small little chamber in the middle for a ruler who probably did not hit puberty before they died. Port Said is a nice retreat from all the historical culture. I enjoyed the fact that everything to do there did not revolve around staring at either long-dead people, or long-dead people’s possessions. Eating squid at one of the restaurants there was quite an interesting experience – I am a finicky eater and not prone to try strange things, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. Port Said would have been my favorite part of the entire trip had I been lucky enough to see an aircraft carrier go through the Suez Canal. Unfortunately somebody’s military was not catering to me like they should have been. Don’t worry though, I’ve already written a nasty letter.
Caveats and Assorted Advice
The key to a rewarding trip to Egypt is the up front planning. I never would have survived without a tour guide. Egyptian culture is so different from what I’m used to that it’s almost like being in a foreign country. A tour guide is a must, and contacts within the embassy/military can be very helpful for lodging and other arrangements. November is the best time of year to go, because it’s not peak tourist season and the sun goes down every eighteen hours or so. Don’t worry about the food in the market place, as long as it’s cooked. The only time I got sick on that trip was on the government run cruise boat. Sadly, my sickness caused me to miss the one thing I wanted to see most - an authentic Egyptian (who is actually from San Diego) belly dancer and her jiggling belly button.
Do not let anyone carry your bags or hand you toilet paper in the restroom unless you plan on tipping them. Only pick something up that someone is selling if you intend to buy it, otherwise it could get nasty. Take malaria pills. Even though they are the size of small cars, I imagine malaria is very unpleasant. Egypt is a huge dose of culture, and as such is really not a good spring break spot.
Conclusion
Egypt is different. If you are looking for a more exotic vacation, at a low price, with warmth, "Wonders of the World" caliber sites, and a whole different culture, then go to Egypt. As I said before, the key to enjoying a trip to a land as different as Egypt is preparation and planning (same goes for everywhere between Greece and Japan). Time to go defenestrate other people – it’s a hobby.
Recommended:
Yes
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Epinions.com ID:
eeks
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Member: Willy Holt
Location: Boston, Mass
Reviews written: 58
Trusted by: 157 members
About Me:
Wow--looking back on this half my articles were atrocious and embarassingly titled--all for the bling-bling.
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