Amsterdammit (Sorry, I Couldn't Resist the Pun That Doesn't Make Any Sense)
Written: Mar 14 '02 (Updated Mar 14 '02)
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Product Rating:
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Pros: C'mon, it's Amsterdam.
Cons: Dog poop.
The Bottom Line: Yay
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| megugrrrl's Full Review: Amsterdam |
My husband and I arrived slightly hungover one cold morning in Amsterdam without any real plans. We were going to start our vacation by being adventurous and taking the train to some hotel we saw advertised in the baggage claim area, but the crappy weather and confusion make us take a cab. A shiny Mercedes cab. That's all they have leaving Schipol Airport. (Next time I will definitely take the train that drops you off at Central Station. They run 24/7 to and from the airport several times an hour, except for the middle of the night, when it's every hour.)
On the way to our hotel, the cabbie shares that his most favorite thing about Amsterdam is the architecture and I look out the window, still groggy from the flight and feel like I'm in New Jersey. But I like his stories. (You'll find that everyone speaks English in Amsterdam and that everyone has great stories.)
Getting Around in Amsterdam
The first thing you should know about Amsterdam is that your wonderful sense of geographical direction won't work here. The city streets and canals are in a gigantic 'U' shape. You should buy a compass or a really good street map.
We took the tram to get around, because it is the Dutch thing to do, and initially thought they were free. (Of course, we first managed to get lost.) The trams aren't really free, but are based on the honor system, which it seems that most people abuse. You're supposed to board the tram, then punch your own ticket in the rear. (You can buy a ticket from the driver or pre-purhcase a fancy strip of tickets or strippenkaart from tobacco shops, post offices or your hotel front desk.) Maybe one out of ten people punch thier tickets. Of course they might have some kind of special pass in their wallets, but beginning the day by breaking the law was empowering in a twisted way.
The other half of Amsterdam rides a bike. They're all over the place and finding a bike to rent (try Bike City in Westerkerk @ 6263721), buy for dirt cheap at the flea market, or "borrow" is easy. Getting around by bike is a snap.
Amsterdam also has a lot these knee-high phallic-looking poles all over the city that have XXX on them. This is so cars and trucks don't hit the millions of tourists and people on bicycles, and to prevent them from flying into the canals. The XXX is like the crest for Amsterdam which the cabbie from the airport told me was some sort of symbolic gift the queen bestowed upon the citizens because they behaved well during the war. Each X represents some amazing quality like 'bravery'. I know you're probably wondering if there's a connection between XXX videos and this lovely city's crest. You make your own inferences.
Stuff You Gotta See and Experience
The Anne Frank House Westerkerk
Forget shopping for tulip bulbs and clogs, the first thing you should do is visit the Anne Frank House. It's part of history and it will touch your heart. You get to visit the wartime hiding place you read about in her diary. This place sees really long lines so go early (9 am) or just before it closes to beat the crowds.
The Big Three - The Museums of Museumplein
Rijks Museum - Along with the Ann Frank house, this place is a mandatory stop.... lots of Dutch 17th century art paintings, sculptures - Vermeers, Rembrandts (The Nightwatch is at the Rijks Museum!)
Van Gogh Museum - Museumplein
A beautiful space for all Van Gogh. Go, Van Gogh.
Stedelijk - Amsterdam's answer to MOMA
Do go if you are a fan of modern art goodness.
The Heinekeen Brewery Stadhouderskade
This is a real treat if you're looking to fill up on great tasting beer for a nominal fee of $1.20. You'll have to actually go through a tour of the brewery/musuem, which is a lot like a giant advertisement for Heineken, but it's also quite informative and mildly entertaining with the video screens, simulations, and learning how to make beer, all in an original brewing house. The last leg of the tour is what really counts - all-you-can-drink-in-thirty-minutes of Heineken, complete with cubes of cheese and cheese doodles. You can get pretty tipsy in thirty minutes.
(Sidenote: Unlike the kind exported green bottles, Heineken is soooo delicious in Holland. It was fresh, crisp, clean tasting and housed in brown bottles. Beer is fun in Amsterdam. The barkeeps pour your Heineken with full force into a cute little glass and swipe the top with a little spatula leaving around two inches of foam. It's so Euro. They do that so you know the beer is 'alive'. It kind of makes sense, but you also lose two inches of beer.)
The Canals
I found that it's actually worth taking one of those canal boat tours to see Amsterdam from the water. You get to see the main parts of town - the gorgeous historical structures and the various parts of the city you've already visited (or will visit) as well as the empty-looking houseboats that line the canals. You'll have the time (and ability) to scrutinize the gorgeous facades of buildings and houses while enjoying a beverage. There's something tantalizing about the bricks of the buildings. (Maybe that's why I love Lego.) The boats stop at certain places like busses so you can get on and off. (They are narrated in English.)
Coffee Shops
I don't smoke the pot but I felt I couldn't leave Amsterdam without going to a 'coffee shop'. They usually serve booze in addition to cannibis so there's definitely a bar vibe. There are 'coffee shop' chains, like the Bulldog Cafe that are like sports bars, with loud top 40 music and obnoxious patrons, and then there are more mellow places that have words like magic, happy, or dreams in their names. We have a friend who tattoos at Hanky Panky Tattoos, and one night we were waiting for him to get off work and sat around the coffee shop upstairs, and I felt like I was in a pub getting a contact high.
Red Light District
I don't know how I feel about this whole thing yet, but as a tourist I played along and it became somewhat of a novelty to see the women in bikinis behind the glass windows talking on their cell phones or playing Game Boys and I had to fight all rational thought as not to ruin the vibe. We walked in and out of sex toy shops, were offered a lot of drugs, and even went to a live sex show. There was a lot of apathy going on, even with the markers, bananas, lit candles and the live sex show. The last was odd, contrived, pathetic, and stimulating all at the same time. Everything being over, I'm glad I went, just to say I've been.
The Food
I met up with a high school chum who took us to this place called The Pancake Bakery near the Anne Frank house in Westekerk and I gorged on a giant ham and cheese Dutch pancake topped with molasses and washed it down with Heineken. It was intensely yum. Dutch Pancakes are available in sweet or savory, are flatter and denser than US counterparts, and sinfully good.
Since the Dutch colonized Indonesia, the Indonesian food is really good and worth trying while in Amsterdam. Try the Kantjil en de Tijger in Spuistraat.
To the best of my knowledge, I think the first time I've had Continental cuisine on the continent was here in Amsterdam - which was OK.
Places You Might Want to Avoid
Consumer Central - Leidsestraat near Leidesplein
We walked down Leidesplein a grand total of one time, which, even if I had a knife to my throat I still cannot pronounce. Leidesplein is just Swatch, Levi's stores, restaurants and people but it's also the area where live music happens - we saw a few Dutch punk bands in that area.
Tattoo Museum
Amsterdam has a bunch of great museums, even the Sex Museum is good for a chuckle, but the Tattoo Museum was kind of a let down. There really wasn't anything exciting - old equipment and flash, but nothing exciting. The collection is so small you can basically see the entire thing from one place. Save your money.
Dog Poop
Amsterdam has a lot of doggie doo (primarily in residential areas) on the sidewalks. A lot. There were so many cute little Dutch doggies but tons of little land mines everywhere; it was kind of gross. Watch where you step.
Oh, and it is freezing cold in Amsterdam in March. Pack a scarf.
Recommended:
Yes
Best Suited For: Friends
Best Time to Travel Here: Mar - May
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Epinions.com ID:
megugrrrl
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Location: Oakland
Reviews written: 147
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