Colt 45 Malt Liquor

Pros: Low Price; Good foaming action
Cons: Smell; Rather plain

Pros: Very inexpensive, one of the lighter malt liquors on the market.
Cons: Not much character, not the best tasting beer.

Some may question why I bother to review a beer of such low character as Colt 45 Malt Liquor -- known by some as Liquid Crack, and by some as Billy Dee's favorite beer -- but the truth is that this beer is actually quite drinkable and not...

Pros: cheap, if that is a pro
Cons: useless for any purpose except getting sloppy drunk

Colt 45 is one of those products that almost makes you embarrassed to be an American. It is the toast of the ghetto, the champagne of the trailer park, the inspiration of the poor, and the end of the party for the college set. It is the bridge to pure...

Pros: Tastes okay, quick buzz if you want that kind of thing.
Cons: Are you just that tired of living?

The development of malt liquor took place very oddly. People who love this stuff don't rave on and on about flavor, body or anything like that. People who like malt liquor drink it for two reasons -- it's dirt cheap and a person can get drunk fast off of...

Pros: it works every time
Cons: it's not fortified -- why not?

Imagine yourself sitting in a mobile home in some rainy, drab, rural hole, somewhere in Arkansas. Or Oregon. Yeah, Oregon's better. Somehow the bright arc of your life fell at the wrong angle - school, divorce, only El Diety knows where exactly. Now...

Pros: A cheap buzz.
Cons: The low class, unsophisticated, ghetto way to get messed up.

Let's get something straight before we go any further. Consuming a 40 ounce bottle of liquor is not something generally associated with the more sophisticated connoisseurs of fine liquors. Or, to put it in laymen's terms, it's for people who really want...

Pros: you get to utter the phrase "Maxin' and relaxin' with my Colt 45'
Cons: your body actually have to process this stuff

1/100 What can I say, I love the Colt 45 commercial with Billy D. Williams like I like any quality B movie. Its just so absurd. Here is a somewhat high profile entertainer that I'm sure is making enough money to at least buy a non-malt beverage....

Pros: Good if you own drug stocks, like the makers of Tylenol, etc
Cons: Terrible if you have work next week, or next month for that matter

The thought brings tremors through my spine. That infamous night when I wouldn't stop at two crushed forties and attempted to chug a third. Am I idiotic?

If you have had Pabst Blue Ribbon, you know you need a tabasco chaser to make that...

Pros: 40 oz. to freedom
Cons: will there really be a morning?

Oh, thou swill of 40 oz., your big mouth beckons me. Oh, bucking bronco in the horseshoe deliver me from all evil bestowed upon me in the workplace from 9:00 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. Monday through Friday except on days when I, as Saturday reporter, must choose...

Pros: party in a bottle, physical, monetary and social benefits
Cons: aka liquid crack, next day depression due to sugar low

There is no category for Olde English, so I included it under the closest related thing - another malt liquor from Pabst, Colt45. Please take under appropriate consideration. Thank you.

Olde English 800, aka OE8, is the classic malt...

Pros: Get Drunk Fast
Cons: See Above

I just had to write a review on Colt 45 Malt Liquor. Why? Because it was the first brew that I ever got totally wasted on and the fact that I just read a review and it made me think back on the old days. My bad! It was over 30 years ago and I can still...

Pros: Good with the ladies, smooth, goes down easy.
Cons: The 40oz. size is rather heavy.

I drink Colt 45 when I need a taste for a beer that is less exotic, yet, provides me with a good Brew that can be drank at any hour. Colt 45 is a more social beer that usually comes in the 40oz. size. This is a good size bottle and can get you a...

Pros: extra 5oz, associated with coolness
Cons: it's malt liquor and that can't really be good

Colt 45 is sold in 45oz bottles. If any other size is produced, I have never seen it for sale. At 45oz, Colt 45 holds an edge on other malt liquors such as Old-E, Mad Dog or Crazy Horse, which are traditionally sold in 40 oz bottles. Colt 45 is sweet...

Pros: cheap, that's it
Cons: where do I start?

This is one "beer" that has no other purpose except to get drunk on. Of course, this is the one thing that keeps the Pabst brewing Co. from going defunct. That fact alone is a shame as Pabst had it's hayday and that has long since past. The...

Pros: May land you big movies deals (like Billy D. Williams)
Cons: May make you beat your wife (like Billy D. Williams)

Cheap beer is an art form unto itself, and malt liquor is perhaps the highest expression of this art. And the epitomy of malt liquor? Colt 45. This is clearly not a beer one drinks for the taste, because it tastes bad. This is a beer one drinks to get...