Valentine

Pros: Fairly good actresses / actors.
Cons: Some suspense scenes had as much suspense as breakfast at Grandma's house.

Pros: Denise Richards in a hot tub
Cons: Denise Richards dead

Valentine is about the high school nerd who gets his revenge on the hot chicks who wouldn't dance with him at homecoming. From the very beginning, you know it is going to be bad. The local dork does not go around to the four hottest chicks in school...

Pros: Insulting, uninspired, formulaic, lacking originality, not even remotely believable, boring, predictable...
Cons: Nothing adds up. Also, it was so bad that I needed more space for Cons.

Though Denise Richards (The World Is Not Enough) is not naked in this film, her breasts certainly played a major role. Maybe that's because her non-breast related acting was stagnant and her line deliveries were robotic. The only moments...

Pros: Denise Richards and Marley Shelton.
Cons: Everything else.

Urban Legend, I Know What You Did Last Summer, and Valentine. What do these movies have in common?

“Hot chicks, shawnmfan1?”

Yeah, I guess so, but that’s not my point.

“Crappy acting?”

...

Pros: Starts with "D"
Cons: and ends with "enise Richards"

There was a time in my life, I'm not proud of it, when I based a video rental selection on whether the box pictured some configuration of pointy knife, mask, and bug-eyed victim. Call it my 'boo' period; without it, I may never have seen Prom Night, and...

Pros: Not especially bad for a slasher flick.
Cons: Not especially good for a slasher flick.

First off we're going to play a bit of a game. The first person to leave a comment stating where I plucked my review title from will have each and every one of their reviews read and rated. That person then might also be added to my WOT, but if not...

Pros: It's only 98 minutes long.
Cons: Stale, misogynistic script, ineptly directed and superficially performed.

You've seen this movie before. You may not have the ticket stub in your wallet but - trust me - you've been there, seen that.

There's this guy, Jeremy Melton, who remembers when, back in sixth grade, five girls teased and taunted...

Pros: Finally, a return to the classic horror formula of the 80's!
Cons: Pacing a little slow; "WB cast" might dissuade some genre fans away from it

The tradition of Valentine's Day themed slasher flicks lensed in Canada continues with VALENTINE, the newest product from Director Jamie Banks (URBAN LEGEND). The holiday sub-genre remains one of the most eminent and consistently productive facets of...

Pros: Those who like their women natural will appreciate Denise's eyebrows
Cons: Those who like their movies to not officially suck will be disappointed

The recent explosion of American horror can be divided into two (pardon the double-entendre) camps: movies that are supposed to be funnier, and movies that are way funnier, but not because they're supposed to be. Neither are necessarily better, but then...

Pros: Not as bad as it could have been, I suppose.
Cons: Dumbed down slasher film of the nth degree.

(Dir: Jamie Blanks, Starring Marley Shelton, Denise Richards, Jessica Capshaw, Jessica Cauffiel, David Boreanaz, Daniel Cosgrove, Fulvio Cecere, Johnny Whitworth, Katherine Heigl, Wyatt Page, Benita Ha, Hedy Burress, and Jo-Ann Fernandes)

...

Pros: A serial killer ending up free in a bizarre twist at the end.
Cons: Acting was poor, plot was shallow, not a good thriller or horror movie.

When a movie leaves you laughing when you are supposed to be scared out of your mind, you know there is something wrong. I came into this movie expecting surprise after surprise and to be startled time after time. Unfortunately, the only thing that...

Pros: not has bad as Urban Legend II.
Cons: comes close to the same level as Urban Legend II.

What happens when you drop the V, the A, both E's, both N's, the T, and the I from Valentine, you get just the L, now make that shape using your right hand and firmly yet gently place your hand against your forehead. LOSER!!! This movie is a Loser. A...

Pros: It used diverse ways to kill people...
Cons: mmm.... Denise Richard's eyebrows...

Firstly, i'd like to say that i watched this movie after i watched "The Forsaken", and that movie lowered my expectations A LOT. I was expecting total crap (ie "The Forsaken") and i got pleasantly surprised! I think mostly it's because the movie has the...

Pros: Nice looking women
Cons: Every other possible way to value a film was BAD

Why would a guy who normally reviews art films be caught reviewing "Valentine"?

Two words can describe why I went to see this film: Marley Shelton.

She used to travel in my social circle when she was 16 or so, and though I never...

Pros: good as the previews, a twisted ending and a good cast
Cons: plot is a bit confusing and halfway through the movie you know who's offing everyone

Finally a good slasher movie where the previews actually made it as good as it was! If Critics could get over the fact that... Yes, Girls are Chased down dark hallways by a Mask wearing Serial Killer in "Valentine", they would actually realise that the...