Creating Considerate Comments
Nov 13 '00
As of late, I've really begun to enjoy reading epinions. Up to this point, I was what you might call a "casual epinioner." I don't by any means consider myself among the ranks of the elite, but over the past 4 days I've read and rated well over 400 reviews... Now to my point.
As the name of this site suggests, it is for stating opinions, and I believe this should be done in an adult and respectful manner. For the most part, I find the opinions themselves to be of this nature, but the comments regarding them are often spiteful, juvenile attacks on the opinion of the author. It is on this particular point that I have a few proverbial bones to pick with some of you.
I will pick a particularly heated topic which I've come upon a lot recently. That topic is abortion. Pro-choice, pro-life, or somewhere in the middle, it doesn't truly matter for my purposes here. I have my definite gut feelings regarding the subject, and have read several reviews in absolute contrast to those feelings. Not once though, will you find me making a rude and hateful remark to a fellow epinioner. On occasion, I have felt compelled to NR or SR, not because I disagree with what was written, but rather the way in which it was written. I have done this to individuals on either side of the fence.
Now, what do I hope to achieve by writing this review?
Other than the fact that it just irks me to no end to see the pettiness of the situation, I hope to make a few of you think about what you are doing and saying. Let's take the exaple of the abortion debate again.
First, I think it's safe to say that none of us like the idea of a woman having an abortion (or am I just too idealistic?). If she is even contemplation the possibility of undergoing such a procedure, something has gone wrong somewhere.
The same things hold true for other explosive topics, such as gun control, and/or censorship. So when someone chooses to berate and belittle someone whose view differs from their own, my first question, whether I post it or just think it, is "What do you hope to accomplish by posting your comment?
If your intention is to anger, start a fight, turn off some, or intrigue others into visiting your epinions, you've most likely achieved your goal. But, if on the other hand, you genuinely wish to be a factor in changing the opinion of another, you're going about it all the wrong way!
You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar!
If you were to ask my husband, he'd probably tell you that this isn't one of my strong suits. <g> My spouse aside, this is one thing on which I pride myself. Brow-beating, Bible-thumping, Bible-bashing, and tongue-lashings do no good. If you use these harsh tactics, chances are, you only turn your audience off; it doesn't matter how valid your point. From that point on, you have lost whatever chance you might have had of brining someone to your "side."
I was going to include some actual comments in this review, and decided there were just too many to chose from, not to mention, I don't want any one individual thinking I am "picking on" them. So, let me make up some examples based on what I've seen. Suppose you run across the following comments, both saying basically the same thing, but in different ways.
You ignorant, self-righteous hypocrite. From your previous postings I know that you support George W. Bush in the next election, partially because of his stance on the abortion issue. Yet he is also the Governor of the state which executes more individuals each year than any other. Why don't you get off your Christian soap box and realize that you are supporting both sides of the same basic debate.
Mr. Doe, I have read some of your earlier reviews, and I find an inconsistency that I would like to bring to your attention for some further thought. You are adamantly against abortion, stating that it is "murder." Is not the death penalty, also supported by George W. Bush murder in the realm of Christian theology. From my knowledge, the death and resurrection of Christ was to end the need for people to pay for their sins with their life. In my opinion, I believe that you have to feel that either both or neither is wrong. I just felt this was an issue I would like you to address. Thank you.
If you were to read both of the above comments, which would you be more apt to take into consideration if you were one of those people "sitting on the fence," or better yet, someone decidedly for the opposing side? Would the first or second comment get you to think? Would one of them only succeed in upsetting you and compelling you to more firmly believe your preconceived notions about people with the opposite view?
If your goal is to help someone make a more educated decision, as is the intention of Epinions.com, then this should apply to all of your writing, whether it is an actual review, or merely a comment. In order to achieve that goal, each and every writer should show respect and consideration to everyone else. That is the adult thing to do!
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Epinions.com ID:
hlcooper75
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Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
Reviews written: 54
Trusted by: 26 members
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