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| Jun 03 '05 |
I sense something ... a presence I've not felt since... |
Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
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| May 30 '05 |
It's not every day you can say "...and David Schwimmer as The Giraffe!" |
Madagascar
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| Dec 27 '03 |
You'll see it for Ferrell; you'll see it again every Christmas. |
Elf
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| Dec 27 '03 |
Dumb hotties get sliced up by freaky cannibals. Period. |
Detour
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| Dec 27 '03 |
Sags in the middle, but still one helluva boat ride. |
Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World
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| Dec 27 '03 |
A loud and zany gift to movie freaks - from Hollywood's biggest movie freak |
Looney Tunes - Back in Action
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| Dec 27 '03 |
This movie that sucks will make lots of bucks. There, I rhymed. |
Dr. Seuss' The Cat in the Hat
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| Dec 24 '03 |
Jewish Comedy Lesson #32: Adam Goldberg is Funny; Adam Sandler is Not |
The Hebrew Hammer
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| Dec 24 '03 |
The complete and total opposite of a Wonderful Life. |
Bad Santa
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| Dec 24 '03 |
Similar in many ways to Dances with Wolves...only much better. |
Last Samurai
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| Dec 24 '03 |
This is not the Eddie Murphy I choose to remember. |
Haunted Mansion
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| Dec 24 '03 |
I've simply run out of adjectives. |
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
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| Dec 24 '03 |
It's like an action movie that uses conversations instead of guns |
House of Sand and Fog
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| May 18 '03 |
Big, loud, expensive, flashy...intelligent? Heck, I'm sold! Bring on X3! |
X2: X-Men United
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| May 18 '03 |
HEY WANNA WATCH MY HOME MOVIES? THERE'S BARE BOOBS! |
The Real Cancun
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| May 18 '03 |
Say goodbye to that old Eddie Murphy we used to love so much. |
Daddy Day Care
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| May 18 '03 |
The best 1960s comedy released so far this year. |
Down with Love
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| May 15 '03 |
Buckle your seat belts and bring your thinking caps! |
The Matrix: Reloaded
in Movies in Theaters |
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| Mar 27 '03 |
Yet another action/adventure, sci-fi, romance, dream sequence anthology. |
Dreamscape
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| Mar 27 '03 |
A thinking man's brain candy. |
Tuvalu
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| Mar 24 '03 |
A biopic that deftly avoids the usual tiresome gimmicks |
Bamba
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| Mar 24 '03 |
As a song, it's awful. As a movie, it's almost painful. |
Harper Valley P.T.A.
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Stunningly drab, particularly considering the word 'mania' is in the title. |
Blood Mania
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| Mar 24 '03 |
French gal from Better Off Dead gets naked! You know you're interested. |
Second Time Lucky
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Who ever knew graphic lesbianism could be some damn tedious? |
Vampire Obsession
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| Mar 24 '03 |
One of those 'not nearly as cool as the title' flicks. |
Cannibal Apocalypse
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Yeah, these flicks are just that damn good. Isn't it great? |
Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Maybe XXX wasn't that bad after all.... |
Die Another Day
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Didn't these guys used to BOLDLY go NEW places? |
Star Trek: Nemesis
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| Mar 24 '03 |
It ain't deep, but it ain't awful. |
When Night Is Falling
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Two solid actors save a movie from its own pretense. |
Kiss the Sky
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Lotsa yap, poor effects, and not ONE factory! |
Death Factory
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| Mar 24 '03 |
I can't imagine under what circumstances you'd be watching this movie. |
Night Evelyn Came out of the Grave
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Two awful flicks jammed together. See if you can spot the seams! |
Devil's Nightmare
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Yeah, but it would never stand up in court. |
God Told Me To
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| Mar 24 '03 |
What's next? Pinhead as Cyrano? |
Wishmaster: The Prophecy Fulfilled
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Blade + The Matrix - a budget = Stakes |
Stakes
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Again, I play my 'uncultured swine' card. |
Katzelmacher
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Not sexy, not entertaining...and poorly subtitled, too. |
Tokyo Decameron: Three Tales of Madness and Sensuality
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Take note, movie fans: Jason Isaacs in a Lead Role! |
Dangerous Lady
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Leering Asian Oddness about weather patterns and white panties. |
Weather Woman
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Better-than-you've-heard literary adaptation...yes, with Bill Murray. |
Razor's Edge
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| Mar 24 '03 |
...with Kobe Tai as Sarah Connor!!! |
Terminatrix
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Ironic Film Titles, Lesson 14 |
Joyride
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Sloppy chop-socky |
Blackbelt
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Of interest only as proof of Reynold's bizarre 70's superstardom |
Shamus
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Very Helpful |
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| Mar 24 '03 |
Jagged Edge Part 34 |
Cause of Death
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Very Helpful |
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| Nov 12 '02 |
Looking for a siesta? |
Optic Fiber
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| Nov 12 '02 |
Oooh, Robert Davi, Shannon Tweed AND Andrew Dice Clay?? |
No Contest
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| Nov 12 '02 |
Alan Alda as a psychotic Vietnam vet! You know you're interested! |
To Kill a Clown
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| Nov 12 '02 |
Another talentless 90210 refugee pops up. |
Corporation
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| Nov 12 '02 |
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Victoria's Secret |
Perils of Gwendoline
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| Nov 12 '02 |
For those who like a little incest in their awful action movies. |
White Fire
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| Nov 07 '02 |
Social commentary with a souped-up exterior. |
Vanishing Point
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Very Helpful |
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| Nov 07 '02 |
So resoundingly bad, it can't possibly be an accident. |
XXX
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Very Helpful |
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| Nov 07 '02 |
Fatally silly, ultimately exasperating. |
Femme Fatale
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| Oct 29 '02 |
Does 'not awful' count as a positive review? |
First Degree
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Helpful |
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| Oct 29 '02 |
The cinematic equivalent of...something really...terrible. |
Deadly Scavengers
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| Oct 29 '02 |
[Insert witty derision here] |
Blood Theater
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| Oct 29 '02 |
Make's Porky's look like Dr. Strangelove |
Bikini Academy
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| Oct 29 '02 |
All signs point to another fantastic flick. |
Signs
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| Oct 26 '02 |
I was confused, amused, periodically irritated, and generally entertained. |
Full Frontal
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| Oct 26 '02 |
Grimy and dreary are today's keywords. |
Satan Was a Lady
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| Oct 26 '02 |
The most hateful witch you'll ever root for. |
Last Seduction
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Very Helpful |
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| Oct 20 '02 |
Timothy Hutton and the Temp of Doom |
Temp
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| Oct 20 '02 |
Limpmember |
Austin Powers in Goldmember
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| Oct 20 '02 |
The title says it all, unfortunately. |
Cooking With Porn Stars
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| Oct 20 '02 |
More like Club SUCK! Bahaha! (I kill me!) |
Club Vampire
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| Oct 20 '02 |
It's not pornography...but it's pretty darn close. |
Colin's Sleazy Friends
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| Oct 13 '02 |
Yet another bloodless vampire flick. |
Red Blooded American Girl
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| Oct 13 '02 |
The coolest kind of cinematic candy...with lots of giant spiders. |
Eight Legged Freaks
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| Oct 13 '02 |
Easily the best football flick you've probably never seen. |
Best of Times
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| Oct 13 '02 |
Dear Kirsten Dunst...Marry Me. |
Get Over It
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| Oct 13 '02 |
Private School...for Boys (Very dumb boys) |
Private School
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| Oct 12 '02 |
One of the most awful sequels in the grand pantheon of awful sequels. |
Mannequin: On the Move
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Lens Cap: The Movie |
Stricken
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Bloody unwatchable. |
Dracula Rising
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| Oct 12 '02 |
If Thelma & Louise were homicidal lesbians... |
Butterfly Kiss
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Not one laugh. Not, One. |
National Lampoon's Movie Madness
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Words fail me. |
Jaws 4 - The Revenge
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| Oct 12 '02 |
One of the coolest "cable flicks" you're likely to come across. |
Last Starfighter
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Entertaining despite the script. |
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Entertaining big-budget quest flick souffle. |
Willow
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| Oct 12 '02 |
Stunningly, depressingly bad. |
Curse of the Jade Scorpion
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Very Helpful |
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| Jul 11 '02 |
An old-fashioned and clearly gorgeous gangster tale. |
Road to Perdition
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Very Helpful |
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| Jul 11 '02 |
The coolest 'futuristic dragon' movie I ever did see! |
Reign of Fire
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Very Helpful |
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| Jul 04 '02 |
When did we start PAYING to watch TV commercials? |
Men in Black 2
in Movies in Theaters |
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| Jun 27 '02 |
Adam Sandler Revisits an Old Sitcom Plot - Part 6 |
Mr. Deeds
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| Jun 25 '02 |
Let your silly childhood nostalgia slumber unmolested. |
Scooby-Doo - The Movie
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| Jun 20 '02 |
Offers everything that quality sci-fi should. Brilliantly entertaining. |
Minority Report
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| Jun 20 '02 |
We're a long way from The Lion King, folks. |
Lilo & Stitch
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| Jun 15 '02 |
It's Afro-rific! |
Undercover Brother
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| Jun 15 '02 |
Action Sequence A, Dialogue Scene B: Lather, rinse, repeat |
Windtalkers
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Very Helpful |
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| May 30 '02 |
Packs a wallop. |
Sum of All Fears
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Very Helpful |
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| May 29 '02 |
Coppola's kid hits a solid double |
CQ
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Very Helpful |
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| May 24 '02 |
Stark, dark, bright & brilliant, Insomnia will keep you awake. |
Insomnia
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| May 22 '02 |
Are we all still THRILLED about Travolta's 'comeback'? |
Domestic Disturbance
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| May 20 '02 |
You'll need a good wash after sitting through this one. |
Wash
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| May 19 '02 |
Gleefully raunchy. Painfully stupid. Pretty damn funny. |
Not Another Teen Movie
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| May 16 '02 |
Hugh Fidelity |
About a Boy
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